Fallout New Vegas: Doctor's Heart

S

stonefire310

First time out of the vault
hey i know i am not good at writing, last story was a bust. but T decided to do a preview for my next story before i start writing.

Fallout New Vegas: Doctor’s Heart
Plot: Maria Theresa Gonzalez is in love with the newest member of the followers of the Apocalypse, Jennifer Morris, a 30 year old woman who was a doctor back in New Reno. Her friends Rose of Sharon Cassidy and Veronica Renata Santangelo decide to help her out. Set after either the quests No Gods, No Masters or Eureka!.

Characters:
Maria Theresa Gonzalez: the courier. She was a former soldier for the NCR, discharged after a near crippling injury to her left leg. She wants to make Jennifer Morris love her the way that she loves Jennifer. She is gay.
Jennifer Morris: a Doctor for the followers of the apocalypse, and Maria’s romantic interest (meaning that maria is interested in Jen, but jen's feelings for maria, which she may or may not have, are unknown) . Not much is known about her except she is blonde, smart, caring and a lesbian.
Veronica Renata Santangelo: a former brotherhood scribe, lesbian and friend of Maria. She left the brotherhood to make her own way. She got drunk one night and ended up in bed with Rose of Sharon Cassidy, and falling in love with her.
Rose of Sharon Cassidy: former caravan operator, three drink-bisexual. She was drunk when she ended up in bed with Veronica and the two became fast lovers.

note that i actually have not written the story itself will get to that when i can...
 
who knows i may end up breaking up Cass and Veronica by the end for Cass/Boone&Veronica/Sweetie or Julie Farkas.

i am not going to write the story itself until i decide if it is worth the risk of being humiliated like the last story.

i may also have it that they are former lovers, but Veronica still has feelings for Cass.
 
i'll be taking advice before i actually start writing, so quit critiquing what is not even out yet noob.

and enit? what does that mean?
 
enit - (n) - a portamenteau of the phrase "ain't it". Used to denote just about anything in certain tenses and contexts.
 
ah, you are wondering if this story is going to be like the last one then?
Like i said i plan on not writing this story without knowing it will be well recieved, what i posted is just a plot and list of main characters that will be in the story.

even if i type it up, i will not actually post it right away.

the main problem right now is picking between independent and NCR ending, and that will determine the setting.
 
i thought about it, maybe i could put Cass and Veronica in an on-again-off-again relationship.

thiughts on which Setting to do for the Old Mormon fort? them leaving (eureka!) or full of civilians (no gods, no masters) are the choices.
 
stonefire310 said:
Like i said i plan on not writing this story without knowing it will be well recieved,
Click to expand...

I don't think you should worry about whether it will be well recieved. You should write whatever you want because you want to write. It was just that in the other story it seemed a bit too... indulgent.
 
Joelzania said:
stonefire310 said:
Like i said i plan on not writing this story without knowing it will be well recieved,
Click to expand...

I don't think you should worry about whether it will be well recieved. You should write whatever you want because you want to write. It was just that in the other story it seemed a bit too... indulgent.
Click to expand...

the last story had very little about the scene, that is what i wanted to avoid this time around. and by indulgent, you mean lenient, right? if you do, then this story has a specific plot: Maria is in love with New follower of the apocalypse Jennifer Morris, and the story is about her and Jennifer getting together.
 
I'm not sure posting character profiles is the way to go in the beginning. The appeal to a fallout fan-fic is to take something the audience is familiar with, and walking the audience through the story, littering the path with little surprises.
Telling the audience that Maria will fall for this Followers' chick takes away the surprise.

Another thing you have to ask yourself is how canon your story will be. If it is NCR - ending, you need to define your character as NCR. Look through all the pro (and con) NCR quests and see what the possible results may be, and use that to define the setting.

Also, you absolutely have to use complete sentences. *note this is not really necessary persay, but everyone appreciates it better in professional format. It automatically makes people feel a little better about that story.

If you need help establishing the world you're setting them, I'd be happy to give you a hand. But, I'm not gonna touch your pairings with a 94,000 foot pole.
Besides, I'm VERY supportive of Veronica and Christine.
 
Ryan: in the story , maria is already in love with her. you can say that at the beginning it is more of a crush that a requited love. the story is going to be about the two getting together. plus i wanted to give readers a look into each character's mindset as to how they will relate to the story.

established: Maria being in love with Jennifer.
unknown: Jennifer's feelings for Maria. by romantic interest, i mena that maria is interested in her.

plus i figured i'd leave the details about how they get together a secret, so the readers will anticipate it and be wanting more as i keep them in suspense over when they get together. besides if it was not mentioned before hand, it would be pretty obvious that they would get together. the title was a dead givaway as to what would be happening, might as well get the pairings out of the way.

i may rewrite this though, keep the same setting, just add a new doctor and wipe out anything to do with Maria/doctor pairing, but still...
 
Well, in a love story.... You have lots of things you can do. I'll take CBS romantic comedy for example. In Mike & Molly, the couple is already established, there is no suspense because you know who they are and that they will always be together. What makes that story so good is watching that relationship grow.
However, in order to pull that off, you have to make it about a couple that the audience really pulls for. Mike & Molly wouldn't have worked out if it were about a cheerleader and a jock. It's about the overlooked, the imperfect who love eachother despite the "flaws".

But you have other courses of action. My favorite is How I met your mother. You introduce the character already stating they want love. The story becomes about their journey to find it. The end is already defined, and so the beauty of the story is how they get there.
I thought that might work for you because, if you say this is the story of how Maria meets Jennifer, but in the beginning, she becomes attracted to someone else, the audience already knows that won't work out. That kind of plot device is interesting, especially as the audience becomes more and more attached to that couple, even though they have to accept it will not work out in the end.

That's just some advice once again, do with your story what you will. I'm just tossing out ideas.
 
well, ryan, i did actually change it, but the character list could use a little work. the doctor just has a new name so i decided to remove some things about her.

here is the new details for anyone who wants them:

Plot: Maria Theresa Gonzalez is in love with the newest member of the followers of the Apocalypse, though she won't admit it to anyone. Her friends Rose of Sharon Cassidy and Veronica Renata Santangelo decide to help her out. What is going to happen?

Characters:
1.Maria Theresa Gonzalez: the courier. She was a former soldier for the NCR, discharged after a near crippling injury to her left leg. She is gay.
2.Catherine Walker: a Doctor for the followers of the apocalypse. Not much is known about her except she is ginger-haired, smart, caring and a lesbian. She came from New Reno to help the people of new Vegas.
3.Veronica Renata Santangelo: a former brotherhood scribe, lesbian and friend of Maria. She left the brotherhood to make her own way. She got drunk one night and ended up in bed with Rose of Sharon Cassidy, and falling in love with her.
4.Rose of Sharon Cassidy: former caravan operator, three drink-bisexual. She was drunk when she ended up in bed with Veronica and the two became fast lovers.

altered Catherine's hair color.
 
here is a rough draft of Chapter one:


Chapter 1:
*Maria’ Point of View*
I was sitting there looking at all the people that were there at the old Mormon fort. Since I gained Vegas’s independence while still keeping favor with the NCR; Freeside became the most peaceful district of Vegas. The main reason for me being there was this ginger-haired woman working with the followers of the apocalypse. The followers did not mind if I sat down and just watched them, since I helped them out with their, supplies, issue. I noticed the ginger-haired woman looking at me. As I took a closer look at her, I could not believe who it was. I got up to talk to her. When I got close enough to her, I said:
“Catherine Walker, is that you?”
“Maria Theresa Gonzalez, it is definitely me, babe.” She answered with glee.
I was happy to see my supposedly ex-girlfriend again, since we took a break from our relationship. I noticed Cass, who I helped deal with the crimson Caravan and Vangraffs, albeit not in the way she wanted. She came up to us and was wondering who I was talking to.
“So, Talon, who is this?” the drunkard asked.
“You are still using that nickname?” Catherine asked me.
“Cass, this is Catherine, my…girlfriend, I guess you could say. Catherin this is my gal pal Cass, a former caravan driver, and personal guard to the madam president of new Vegas. That’s me.” I said introducing my girlfriend and my friend.
“Well, good to meet you, Cass.” Catherine stated.
The place was crowded due to the influx of civilians I convinced the Followers to care for. We decided to talk in private, so we went to the private labs. After we made sure that we were alone, I finally saw Catherine without the smile she always wore.
“Alright Catty-watty, what’s going on?” I asked, using the pet-name a came up for her.
“Are we going to get back together and end this break we are on?” She sternly asked.
“I-I do not know. I mean, we have been on a break for this long and I know it is killing you, but I doubt it will work out.” I stated.
“Why won’t it work out?” she asked, informing “We are best friends, we love each other. Maria, we are meant for each other and you know it”
“I know, I know we are meant for each other.” I said. “Listen, my love, I just need time to think about it. We haven’t seen each other for four years, and we haven’t even thought about being together since we began our break seven years before that”
“Ugh, fine, I’ll let you think on it. But you better have an answer for me.” She practically ordered me.
“You know, this is why I suggested that we take a break from all this. You are always forcing me to do things or give you answers to questions I do not have the answer to right away.”
I slammed the door and left the fort. Cass asked about Catherin and what went on and I explained. She was shocked but understood why I wanted to wait to give Catherine my answer as to if I want to get back together with her….

like i said it is just a rough draft no way final, so do not be too rough on the critiques.
 
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