Joke about emigrants in Canada.

F

Fas Ist

It Wandered In From the Wastes
In the diary of an emigrant:

15 August
We arrived in Canada :D .I am pleased with this country.Everithing is beautiful,especially the mountains.I'm waiting impatiently to see them,covered by snow.

15 october
CANADA!!!It is the most beautiful place in the world.The leaves of the trees are coloured in a beautiful red-orange colour.I went for a walk this morning and I even saw some deers.They are so gratious and calm.It is a real heaven here.

11 November
The shooting season is going to be openned soon.This is a little bit terrible.I cannot imagine how someone is killing a deer-so defenceless and pretty animal.We are waiting for the snow.I like this place.

2 December
At last!!!It was snowing during the night and when we woke up we openned the window.A beautiful viewing appeared in front of us.Just like a Christmas picture postcard.I and my wife sweeped the snow from the stairs in front of our house and after that,we started batteling with snowballs.But a snow-plough came and covered our stairs in with snow.My wife got angry,but I sweeped the snow again.Here is so beautiful.I am in love with this country.

12 December
It was snowy this night.The snow-plough passed and covered the parking place with snow.

19 December
It was snowy this night again.I couldn't sweep the snow from the parking-place,so I didn't go to work by car.Here is very good,but I am tired of the pergamently cleaning the parking-place.STUPID SNOW-PLOUGH.

22 December
The white nastiness poured out again.My hands are covered by blood bladders.My waist pains me.This is because of the endless cleaning the snow from the parking-place.I have the feeling that the idiot who drives the snow-plought is waiting behind the corner to cover the parking-place with snow after I clean it.ASSFUL idiot.

25 December
HAPPY FUCKING CHRISTMAS.The stupid snow has covered the parking-place AGAIN.If only I grabbed the stupid idiot's(with the snow-plough)throat!!! :evil: I swear,I'll strangle him.And why the fucking aldermen want the road to be covered by salt!? ? ?I would bang my car in a bus yesterday!!!!!

27 December
It was snowy this night AGAIN!!!We are like people wrapped in a hogwash hole because of that snow!!!!I haven't been going to work for 3 days.I stopped counting the times I was cleaning the parking place,because of the fucking snow-plough.The weather-man said that there will be 20 santimeters snow tomorrow.IDIOT.Does he know how many hours must I clean the parking-place tomorrow :evil: :evil:

28 December
That stupid weather-man was wrong :evil: .There are 50 santimeters snow!!!I hope the fucking snow won't melt during the summer.Even the snow-plough sticked in the streed :twisted: :twisted: .The man who drives it asked me to give him a shovel.I told him that I had broken 6 shovels when I had been cleaning the white shits from the parking-place and now I was going to break the 7-th one in his head :twisted:

4 January
Today I got away from my house :D .But when I was going back from work,I saw that stupid animal(the deer) and BANG. :shock: He hit my car with his hoof.He destroy it INDEED :evil: .I wonder why those stupid lazy hunters didn't exterminate the fucking low creatures(the deers)in November.I want to tear them into pieces.I had my car fixed,but it needed A MONTH to be repaired.It had even rusted because of the salt the aldermen commanded to be spread over the roads.

10 may
That was the last straw. :evil: I am going to live in Florida :twisted: I can't imagine that someone would want to live in that fucking Canada.


P.S. Canada is very beautiful country and this is only joke.
 
erm ok...

Not a very happy person are you?

1 surprised emoticon
2 happy emoticons
10 very mad emoticons
 
This little story is funny. Albeit poorly translated and full of spelling errors. :wink:
 
Er... it always snows in Canada, right?
So the emigrant in Canada should be patience with the snow. :)
 
Patience my ass. North Dakota gets as much snow as northern Siberia, and I can feel his agony, especially the part with the shoveling, (poor loser hasn't got himself a snowblower) and the deer. The damn bastards jump out at you whenever you're driving, it's like it's a conspiricy. I'm so glad it's summer right now.
 
Canada has snow all year, we are also the second biggest country in the world (the first nation of hockey) and have some of our borders in the artic circle.

That joke is a classic in Canada. It also reflects the feeling of the first winter for immigrants.
 
Depends where you are in Canuckasthan.


which brings me to ask, where are you from ?

i see quebec, i see London and i see T-dot, i see sympatico and rogers.
 
Paladin Solo said:
which brings me to ask, where are you from
Click to expand...

He's from KanaDA.
Click to expand...

Indeed I am.

but seriously, I’m from the giant metropolis of Toronto, center of the world as we know it :wink: . I guess you can call me a Torontonian.


Edit:

Now im in China....
God bless proxies
 
Hey Paladin Solo it's all about perception, hell a soccer ball is huge if compared to an ant. :)
Edit: point taken and error corrected. Cheers!
 
Indeed I am. screw those conformists, long live the revolution :idea: death to all capitalist pigs :twisted:
 
Hum, considering its hot summer here, temperature during day easily over 30 (35 to 40) celsius and Ive never been to a place where I actually felt snow, I can only nod and smile. Ppor guy isolated in a cabin surrounded by snow on all sides. And poor deers, such delicate creatures.
 
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