Draconias Galactica
First time out of the vault
I'm trying for something short this time. Blasphemous, I know, but I must TRY!
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"Whole Corner"
By Draconias Galactica
I hold Lauren's limp body in my hands, loosing track of whose blood is whose as it all drips down to the dirt around me, and Leike asks, "Do you know what happens when we die?"
We bleed.
"What about your grandpa? He died in his sleep, didn't bleed a drop?"
You said "we". When we die, we die bloody. So does everyone around us.
"Probably. But, what about after that?"
Birds.
"And, after that?"
Fuck you if you're gonna keep asking questions you already know the answer to, I shout, looking, glaring over my shoulder at him. I say, get to the point already. What fucking happens?!
"We become stars," Leike says, looking up at the sky. The haze that's usually there ain't there, showing a thousand lights up high. My mom used to take me outside at nights, and name each one of them. She died a lot like Lauren -- in a bloody shoot-out, and it was all my fault.
Lauren isn't gonna be a star, I say.
I look back down at her. Even with a hole through her forehead, she's still got the same face. Even with blood covering it, it's still the same face. Except she's an it now. Not a person, not a star, not anything but a corpse. Just another fucking corpse!
"Hell, maybe you're right. You and me, we're gonna be stars. We're gonna burn up, and only come out at night, and be totally useless except for something to look at. But she's free now. Maybe she'll be a cloud. Floating wherever she wants, and giving shade."
Who cares what maybe she'll be, huh, I ask.
I put her down gentle, and walk over to the corner. This is the middle of nowhere, and there's two broken walls running into each other. A whole building was here once, maybe even a whole city. Now, there's a whole corner, and it's where I put my shovel down.
I pick the shovel up, and dig. The dirt's dry and hard, and nothing can live on it. This city is dead, this dirt is dead, and this place is only getting more dead because the dead are piling up. Well, good. Great! JUST FUCKING PERFECT!
I don't want anything here to be alive. I want it all to die.
Leike shoves his shovel into the dirt and helps build my hole. For once, he isn't talking.
Thrust, lift, hurl. Thrust, lift, hurl. Thrust, lift, bleed, hurl. Thrust, bleed, lift, bleed, hurl, cough and bleed. My eyes can't cry, never could, but my body found a way around it.
The hole isn't much, but it's deep enough to cover up the smell. Not her smell. Its stench. I walk back over to her...no, it! That's not her, damnit! Not since that bullet passed through her head. She's...
She's a cloud now. And that's not her.
I pick it up. It's heavy and its back is covered with blood gone sticky. As if it isn't hard enough to let her go already.
I look down at her-cum-it, still just enough her to call her that, and say, say something.
Leike shrugs, and says, "Here lies Lauren. Friend, partner, and companion. And all I can say is that it's a damn waste for her to be wasted in this dirt. That's why she has to be a cloud. The end."
The wind sings a pitiful melody, and takes my hat off. Please don't be mad Lauren -- I would have done it myself, but I can't move at the minute.
Leike turns away and goes off to loot the other it's. As soon as he's gone, my legs stop pretending they're worth shit and give way. And I still can't move. Not that there's anywhere to move to. Not that there's anything I can do even if I can move. Not that it would matter anyways.
It's not her, and I'm not me, but whoever is me grabs the shovel and starts covering whatever was her up. And it's all that I can do for her anymore. I finish piling the dirt on, and notice there's no marker. Just a corner in the middle of nowhere, reserved for the memory of a city. So I grab my hat and a rock, and weigh the hat down into a tombstone. And it's all that I can give her.
"You should save that for yourself," Leike says, coming back. "Just in case, you know?"
What difference does it make? I'm already dead.
"Fair enough," Leike shrugs, sighing. "So, do you want to be free as well?"
I take out my gun, aim it at the sky, and try to find a spot that needs another star. There's so goddamn many of them already. Worthless in life, redundant in death...
I wish my mom had shown me dad, and all his friends. Maybe then, I would have listened to her.
There's one more thing to do before I shut my eyes, I say, looking back at Leike. I want to make that bastard into a star.
"Let's go, then," Leike says, shrugging his shoulders. "It's no world worth living where the stars outnumber the clouds."
As we walk off, I look up towards the sky. There's a million stars, all dead, all useless...and one cloud I'd run away with any way I could. If I could. But now, there's just one whole corner in the middle of nowhere, and nothing else but the ever-increasing dead.
-----
"Whole Corner"
By Draconias Galactica
I hold Lauren's limp body in my hands, loosing track of whose blood is whose as it all drips down to the dirt around me, and Leike asks, "Do you know what happens when we die?"
We bleed.
"What about your grandpa? He died in his sleep, didn't bleed a drop?"
You said "we". When we die, we die bloody. So does everyone around us.
"Probably. But, what about after that?"
Birds.
"And, after that?"
Fuck you if you're gonna keep asking questions you already know the answer to, I shout, looking, glaring over my shoulder at him. I say, get to the point already. What fucking happens?!
"We become stars," Leike says, looking up at the sky. The haze that's usually there ain't there, showing a thousand lights up high. My mom used to take me outside at nights, and name each one of them. She died a lot like Lauren -- in a bloody shoot-out, and it was all my fault.
Lauren isn't gonna be a star, I say.
I look back down at her. Even with a hole through her forehead, she's still got the same face. Even with blood covering it, it's still the same face. Except she's an it now. Not a person, not a star, not anything but a corpse. Just another fucking corpse!
"Hell, maybe you're right. You and me, we're gonna be stars. We're gonna burn up, and only come out at night, and be totally useless except for something to look at. But she's free now. Maybe she'll be a cloud. Floating wherever she wants, and giving shade."
Who cares what maybe she'll be, huh, I ask.
I put her down gentle, and walk over to the corner. This is the middle of nowhere, and there's two broken walls running into each other. A whole building was here once, maybe even a whole city. Now, there's a whole corner, and it's where I put my shovel down.
I pick the shovel up, and dig. The dirt's dry and hard, and nothing can live on it. This city is dead, this dirt is dead, and this place is only getting more dead because the dead are piling up. Well, good. Great! JUST FUCKING PERFECT!
I don't want anything here to be alive. I want it all to die.
Leike shoves his shovel into the dirt and helps build my hole. For once, he isn't talking.
Thrust, lift, hurl. Thrust, lift, hurl. Thrust, lift, bleed, hurl. Thrust, bleed, lift, bleed, hurl, cough and bleed. My eyes can't cry, never could, but my body found a way around it.
The hole isn't much, but it's deep enough to cover up the smell. Not her smell. Its stench. I walk back over to her...no, it! That's not her, damnit! Not since that bullet passed through her head. She's...
She's a cloud now. And that's not her.
I pick it up. It's heavy and its back is covered with blood gone sticky. As if it isn't hard enough to let her go already.
I look down at her-cum-it, still just enough her to call her that, and say, say something.
Leike shrugs, and says, "Here lies Lauren. Friend, partner, and companion. And all I can say is that it's a damn waste for her to be wasted in this dirt. That's why she has to be a cloud. The end."
The wind sings a pitiful melody, and takes my hat off. Please don't be mad Lauren -- I would have done it myself, but I can't move at the minute.
Leike turns away and goes off to loot the other it's. As soon as he's gone, my legs stop pretending they're worth shit and give way. And I still can't move. Not that there's anywhere to move to. Not that there's anything I can do even if I can move. Not that it would matter anyways.
It's not her, and I'm not me, but whoever is me grabs the shovel and starts covering whatever was her up. And it's all that I can do for her anymore. I finish piling the dirt on, and notice there's no marker. Just a corner in the middle of nowhere, reserved for the memory of a city. So I grab my hat and a rock, and weigh the hat down into a tombstone. And it's all that I can give her.
"You should save that for yourself," Leike says, coming back. "Just in case, you know?"
What difference does it make? I'm already dead.
"Fair enough," Leike shrugs, sighing. "So, do you want to be free as well?"
I take out my gun, aim it at the sky, and try to find a spot that needs another star. There's so goddamn many of them already. Worthless in life, redundant in death...
I wish my mom had shown me dad, and all his friends. Maybe then, I would have listened to her.
There's one more thing to do before I shut my eyes, I say, looking back at Leike. I want to make that bastard into a star.
"Let's go, then," Leike says, shrugging his shoulders. "It's no world worth living where the stars outnumber the clouds."
As we walk off, I look up towards the sky. There's a million stars, all dead, all useless...and one cloud I'd run away with any way I could. If I could. But now, there's just one whole corner in the middle of nowhere, and nothing else but the ever-increasing dead.