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Ehehe, you have my condolences - that's a position no man deserves to be in.

You left out what happened next; did she go down again or what?
 
Sorry, bud. More of that and people will think this is a porn site.

But there are other things you learn.

For example- I regret taking this one girl to the beach.

In the summer of my first year at college I met this girl Lisa. Luke, this girl was a knock out, but in ways that surprise. For one, she was about 6 feet tall, which is only an inch or two shorter than me. Seriously, one of the tallest women I ever went out with. Seconly she had this really short blond hair. Not Sinead O'Connor short, but pretty damn short. What I didn't know was that she had just broken up with this serious guy she knew at her old college and was a bit emotionally fucked up. But the consequence of this was that sexually, it was wild. Now in the summer of your first year of college, dating a girl who is seriously in to doing the dirty deed is a blessing. Remember, college is a time for learning.

So anyway, I decide to take Lisa to this bar near the ocean at night and do a bit of dancing. We have the IDs so it's no problem getting in. We're there for awhile, having a good time, etc. Eventually it gets a bit too crowded and we decide to leave and go for a walk on the beach.

Cool, I think, sex on the beach.

So we sneak behind this dude's house to the private part of the beach, off come the clothes and we're fooling around in the dark.

But I forgot a towel. So here we are, rolling about in the sand.
Sand is getting everywhere, but we're doing our best to ignore it.
She's on top. We're going 69.
I give her a little surprise.
She shakes her ass.

My eyes are full of sand.

Regret- Taking this girl to the beach without preparation.

Lesson- Sex on the beach is over-rated. If you're going to go- bring a blanket or expect sand in the worst places.
 
Oh that first one, with the fart, must truly have sucked! :(
The second one; I'll just keep in mind! :wink:
 
Hehe, it was so severe you regret taking her there in the first place? Still, I wish I had such nifty memories to bring with me to the brink of my autumn years ;). The only out of the ordinary place I've done the dirty at is in the forest a few times. While there are some pretty beautiful forests around here (best location was on the edge of a cliff face, about 100 meters above the ground with an open view), the interrupting ants and mosquitos makes you long for the comfort of a warm bed - or at least a blanket - as I can imagine the sand did.
 
In regards to releasing some back wind, it’s not always the guys fault.

For instance, when you get down on a girl, they tend to release one or two when they get really relaxed. In those special occasions simply try not to show that you’ve noticed her little slip. Trust me it can get disastrous if you will.
 
My cousin Alejandro had a worse problem than Welsh. He met this hot girl in a bar and she suggest that they should go to her parents house for they are out for the week in Cancun. They started with foreplay and then oral. The girl first gave him a blowjob. He decides to reciprocate with fingering. At first, all was well until he had the idea of fingering her ass too. My cousin Alejandro has LONG fingers and when he stuck his finger in her ass, she dumped the cargo department on his hand. Seriously, she chocolate-glazed his hand. He did fuck her, though.
 
:rofl:
Oh shit, that's too funny.

A friend of mine was banging this girl who said, in the middle of it, that she had to take a crap.

He said relax and just let go.

So she did.

Only it was his sheets.

So let's break it down-

Regrets- (1) Not listening to the girl and (2) Sticking one's finger up the girl's ass.

Lesson- (1) Becareful what you say in bed, (2) There are places one's fingers are best left avoiding.
 
Thanks guys, I again hosed down my monitor with a mouthful of water that I was sipping when I read this thread.

Bunch of sick fuckers, you guys are.
 
I usually do regret more the things I did not do than things I did - but yeah, if I could go back in time like that guy in Butterfly Effect I would have changed a few things in my life.
 
Guys, I was reading up further posts in this thread and I gotta say - you guys do have a lot of stories to tell, sexualy wise. Specially Welsh - oh gosh!

:roll: :lol:
 
disgusting.jpg


Now explain how that's relevant to the oringinal topic and you will get a cookie. Anyway, I officially declare the sneeze fetish forum to be our new trolling forum:

http://www.sneezefetishforum.org/forums/index.php?act=ST&f=1&t=6734
 
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