Suggestions, Suggestions

[BigBoss]

I posted this in the writers corner, but I figured that if I were to get help with this anywhere, the best place would be here. I'm writing a book. It is going to be a novelization on Fallout 1. I didn't provide much information before, but, this is what I posted in the Writer's Corner.

I've been doing research to write a novel version of Fallout 1 (but been sick lately). I want to stick to canon, but I also want to provide a character backstory. For example, the first chapter is going to take place entirely in the vault, and end as he is looking out into the cave as the vault door is opening. The character will be approximately 22 years old (his 22nd birthday being "just a few months ago" to not specify an exact birthday), he will have been raised by the community (I will have him in his own "vault Apartment", however frequently visiting a couple of unnamed characters he simply calls Ma and Dad, with maybe a not blood-related brother or sister, or even best friend. I haven't decided what job he is going to do, I was thinking of having him be a Vault security guard (one of the reasons he was chosen to draw straws between the most fit of the Vault populace), or possibly in maintenance. Not sure yet. The only things I have verified is that the main character will be male, 22 years old, and raised by the community after his mother died in birth (particularly two people who adopted him, possibly related to him in some way? Aunt or Uncle? But he will only call them by "Ma" and/or "Dad", never revealing their actual names, but also hinting that while these were the two most important figures in his life, the community (that particular level of the Vault) helped raise him.

Any suggestions? I was thinking, since Vault 13 was said to hold 1000 people, maybe have 10 "Living" levels, and the Overseer would have the strongest/most intelligent/healthiest ten of each of these levels draw straws.

Also, the novel WILL be free, and will be posted on here (written many short stories, but never a full-length feature novel). I also wouldn't mind some of our resident artists drawing up some book covers for me (or converting the document to PDF (I don't want to pay for the "full access" feature for the PDf document, but if no one else on here has it I guess I won't have a choice).

I was also thinking that, in order to not let the vault get too crowded (past maybe, 1250 occupants), the Overseer would have make families "get permission" to have more than one children?

Also from what I know, the Hub was HUGE. Supposedly, the Vault (assuming it held 1000 occupants) could be "dropped in there" and people wouldn't even notice. Thus implying there are thousands of people living in the Hub. In the book, I'll calculate it to about 3,000 - 5,000 people currently living in the hub.

Also, since Vault 15 was meant to be "crowded", when the Vault dweller is climbing down the rope through the second elevator shaft, he will notice there are only 6 or 7 living floors instead of the usual ten. After something slightly interesting happening (perhaps almost falling from the rope), he will note to himself that according the the Dweller's Survival Guide and information terminals in the Vault, most Vaults should be equipped with at least "ten" living floor levels (enough for 1000). He will also note many of the "foreign" objects he finds rummaging through some of the rooms (things like religious items to the Buddhist and Hindi religions, the food dispensers dispensing spicy and foreign foods, etc.)

As the Vault Dweller Memoirs was, this book will be in "First-Person", maybe with occasionally mixing in a couple of "Third-Person" moments. I.e. it will say "I" instead of "he". Though I'm thinking that while most of the book will be in First-Person, it would be interesting to combine a few Third-Person perspectives in it.

Again, any suggestions, on any part of the book (basically, any part of the Vault Dwellers adventures). Do you guys suggest me having any side quests take place in the book (besides the Brotherhood of Steel trek to the Glow, which isn't needed to complete the game, but I'm including anyways). Should the Vault Dweller obtain Power Armor before his fight with the Master? Or should he just have some fashioned armor or Combat Armor bought from the Gun Runners (yes, he will encounter them, and possibly the Deathclaws). Again, what side quests should take place in the book?

Also from what I know, the Hub was HUGE. Supposedly, the Vault (assuming it held 1000 occupants) could be "dropped in there" and people wouldn't even notice. Thus implying there are thousands of people living in the Hub. In the book, I'll calculate it to about 3,000 - 5,000 people currently living in the hub.

Are there no "official" population counts for the Hub? I believe to have seen some pretty high counts for the cities in FO2, upto 100 000, which in reality is not very big, humans live clustered, and my lil humble nordic town has about 175 000 people, and is a lil fjord-corner packed in green. 3000 - 5000 sounds very little, like a little farming community. People are notoriously plentiful :I

So maybe a minimum of 25,000 people? 100,000 at the most?

I'm also thinking about giving our Vault Dweller a love interest in the Vault, and at the end, after he has been kicked out, have a short epilouge which, very very slightly implies her and a few others leaving to folow him (though leaving the reader unsure if this actually happened) and hinting this woman would (or maybe wasn't) his future tribal wife.

EDIT:

How about this:

• Shady Sands: 1,000 - 1,500
• Junktown: 2,500 - 5,000
• Hub: 20,000 - 40,000
• Necropolis: 2,500 - 4,000
• Brotherhood: 500 - 700
• Boneyard: Around 100,000 (Vault Dweller's estimate from the places he walked through).
• Adytum Itself and Surrounding Areas: 10,000 - 15,000

I'm going to need a lot of suggestions and help, from all of your (especially Sduibek, Snap Slav, Yamu, and you other Fallout 1 nuts). Firstly, what do you think about my population estimates of the towns. Secondly, what side quests should be included in the book (besides the rescue Tandi from Raiders, go to the Glow for Brotherhood, etc.) Third, throw in anything else you might want to see. I'm going to need your guy's help, I can't this whole thing alone. So, suggestions?

 

[zegh8578]

20-40K surely seems more believable, for a multi-map city. Remember the Hub is big enough to have religious communities, several businesses, a whole wealthy suburb, criminal organizations, a bank, so it would be at least a "proper city", which is much more than just 2-3K.
The other estimates seem reasonable as well. I am still curious about what more authoritative voices opine about it tho

 

[BigBoss]

Yeah me too. I was hoping to even get Brother None and Tagz to throw me some suggestions and opinions also.

 

[naossano]

1000 seems far too much for me for Shady Sands.

Vault 15 probably had 1000 people at best. (with an initially full vault and a balanced birth-rate / death rate)
When they left the vault, the population splitted into 4 majour groups. (Shady Sands - The Jackals - The Khans - The Vipers)
Some people could have joined minor groups, wander alone or just die.
Considering the life in the wasteland could be pretty harsh, and that Shady Sands was often raided, the number of inhabitants could have decreased in the first decades.

Also, the layout of the settlement feels more like a small village, full of people that know each other, than an actual city.
I would range their population between 100 & 250.

1000 inhabitants could fit more with Junktown, that is quite small, but manage to defend themselves agains't raiders and other outside forces.

Necropolis can't have 1000 inhabitants.
Necropolis ghouls are the original vault dweller. Vault gathered 1000 inhabitants.
But ghouls cannot breed but can die. So their population is factually lower than originally.
I would say they are between 200 & 600.

The Hub & Boneyard, indeed, can be far more inhabited, but still, it wouldn't be the standard that we are used to.

 

[zegh8578]

Naossano has a certain point in that the standards would be different, because we are dealing with society not-too-soon after the surface has supposedly been cleansed of life.

I think you should not be afraid to allow for great contrast. Allow The Hub and the "true urban centres" to be quite large - people WILL flock to functioning cities, because there is oportunity there. In those conditions, people will flock for miles and miles, and populations will litterally explode, something that FO1 illustated well with their depiction of the Hub.

A place like Shady Sands, in my opinion, can harbor anything between 100 and 1000, as long as we have no lore-hints to go by, we have to consider at least that it is a double map, and a place with fertile farms. We know it descends from a vault of 1000 (more or less) that split up into 4(?) groups getting out of there, so, give-or-take 250 people to found the place - for then to grow in population during the time it has existed (thanks to farming)

The existing number of individual ghouls in the Fallout universe always bothered be, because they all supposedly come from a limited group, and has been continously hounded and shot for decades.

 

[naossano]

I might be pessimistic, but i don't think the population of Shady Sands would grow that much.

By the time the vault dweller joins Shady Sands, the village is only around 20 years old.
The farming knowledge is not fully mastered as your character is able to teach them a few basics.
They needed time to get used to the Wasteland life, and were regularly raided.
I think it is more likely for them to have a population decrease than a growth in the first years.
But they could have been more than 250 initially, if you consider them as the main group of the major four.

But even if they were 50-100 people, this does still count as a settlement, especially in the early year of the wasteland.

About the ghouls, i am mainly talking about Necropolis ghouls, not all of the ghouls.
Considering that radiation is the basic requirement for being a ghoul and the great war provided enough material, i don't consider hard to believe there were ghouls elsewhere.
But the Necropolis ghouls feel very territorial and don't trust strangers, any strangers. I don't see them welcome anyone in their community, ghouls or not.

(What about Dayglow ?)

But indeed, The Hub & Bonyard could attract a lot of strangers and have many un-governed suburbs.

But i still get the impression that most Junktown citizens knows each other.
I have hard time seeing it with more than 1000-2000 citizens.

 

[BigBoss]

Well, the actual Boneyard map was several maps large. I think its safe to say that there could be other communities in the Boneyard (not just scavengers hiding in the buildings and raiders roaming the streets) besides Adytum, the Blades, and the Followers, just very scattered.

Lets try this:

• Shady Sands: 500 - 1000 (giving them the benefit of the doubt)
• Junktown: 1,000 - 1,500
• Hub: 5,000 - 10,000
• Necropolis: 500 - 1000 (Again, giving them the benefit of the doubt. I'm taking into account the large amount of ghouls living on the surface (including the ones that would attack if you got to close) and the ones in the sewers).
• Brotherhood: 500
• Boneyard: Realistically, maybe 10,000 to 20,000. However the Vault Dweller, seeing the sights and walking the streets might blow this out of proportion in the book.
• Adytum and Surrounding Areas: 2,000 - 3,000 at the most. Adytum seems to be smaller than Shady Sands (only 1 map), but densely packed. However the Blades seemed to consist of a good amount of people. And then we have to take the Followers of the Apocalypse into mind.

Also, I ran into a problem while reading the Adytum article on Nuka-Pedia. The Dweller's memoirs weren't exactly all that clear on what he did in Adytum. Did he side with the Blades? Did he free Adytum from Regulator rule? All it says in the memoirs is this:

I found many enemies, and a few friends, in the Boneyard. I killed when necessary and learned more about the nature of my true foes.

What do we do in the book? Does the Vault Dweller take the time to free Adytum? Or, does he simply discover the truth of the Regulators but refuses to do anything about it?

Also, we need to give the Vault Dweller a name. A first name anyways. I know this will go against canon, but there are several positions and first meetings which will take place, forcing the Dweller to give his name out.

EDIT

Check out my slightly modified book cover. What do you think?

EDIT:

Also, I finished my first chapter... you can see it in Fan Fic area under the "First Chapter" thread.

 

[naossano]

Unfortunatly, i don't think that Max, Natalia or the other guy fit with a so young character you are thinking off.

 

[BigBoss]

Yeah I had finished the first chapter. Note that the first chapter is no where near ready, since I still have to go over it, make sure there's enough attention to detail, proof read it, etc. etc.

So our Vault Dweller is a 22 year old man named Jason. Mother and Father both dead, was raised by a woman named Anna. He's just your common person. He's not a hero, he's not struck with vengeance. There's really nothing pushing him here except himself. Jason's just your common guy who was thrown into a world of horror, chaos, and disarray, and is going to be pushed to his limit, tested, and broken more than once.

Read the first chapter (if you got the time) and tell me what you think:

http://www.nma-fallout.com/showthread.php?201929-The-First-Chapter&p=4015007#post4015007