Tuscan Whole Milk

[citizenkhan]

I'm sure many of you know of this quirky product listed on Amazon.com, but I ran across a review today that gave me a tickle:

9 of 19 people found the following review helpful:
Reviews not entirely straight forward, March 27, 2007
By The Vault Dweller (Chicago, IL) - See all my reviews
I read so many glowing reviews of this product that I just had to have it. I admit it at first sounded foolish to me, (I mean who gets an out of state milk delivery?), but so many positive reviews couldn't be wrong. Well I ordered the milk and waited with bated breath. Finally, the day came and I cracked her open and poured a tall glass.

When I tasted it, it was like tasting... Milk! What the heck! This wasn't some special nectar of the gods or divine moo-juice! This was regular milk! Surprised and angered I reread all the reviews, and came to the following conclusion. Either people only post honest reviews or I learn how to recognize sarcasm on the internet. Since it highly unlilkely that the latter will occur, I expect everyone on these forums to grow up pronto! The internet is not a toy!

That being said as far as milk goes, the Tuscan Whole Milk was pretty good. It was creamy and had the slightest hint of sweetness. I gave it a realistic 2 of 5 stars. I challenge anyone to honestly show me milk that deserves a rating of 3 or more stars.

 

[Sorrow]

Hehehehehe .
Fallout fans FTW!

 

[RUN_LIKE_HELL]

Why the fuck would somebody buy milk online ? might as well order an unsealed steak and eat it raw upon arrival.

 

[Dracon M'Alkir]

Why the fuck would somebody buy milk online ? might as well order an unsealed steak and eat it raw upon arrival.

People are taking laziness to the next level. Why bother even leaving your house anymore?

Order fast food when you're too lazy to even cook your own food, and order your food from the internet when you're too lazy to go to the grocery store. Simple.

House arrest? Not really.

 

[The Vault Dweller]

Thank GOD that review didn't end in "Sincerely, The Vault Dweller" or I'd be having a heart attack since I for a moment thought that I wrote that...

8) ,
The Vault Dweller

 

[Maphusio]

Thank GOD that review didn't end in "Sincerely, The Vault Dweller" or I'd be having a heart attack since I for a moment thought that I wrote that...

8) ,
The Vault Dweller

I don't think anyone noticed the name in the article... But I too, for a moment, thought you wrote that.

Next question is... How did the OP come across this fine product??? Hummm?

 

[citizenkhan]

You really have to read some of the reviews. 938 people have reviewed the milk and I doubt seriously that any of them have ever ordered it. Amazon is full of shit like that. Take this for example - it's straight up our alley.

 

[Maphusio]

You really have to read some of the reviews. 938 people have reviewed the milk and I doubt seriously that any of them have ever ordered it. Amazon is full of shit like that. Take this for example - it's straight up our alley.

I could have sworn that was on Return of the Jedi...

 

[Big T]

Why the fuck would somebody buy milk online ? might as well order an unsealed steak and eat it raw upon arrival.

People are taking laziness to the next level. Why bother even leaving your house anymore?

Yep, I had some groceries delivered today from a major supermarket. Never done this before (and, to be fair, I don't drive, so it would at least make some sense) and I probably will not again. See, I was rather drunk (on Friday night, 'bout 2AM * ) when I placed the order and, consequently, ended up spending nearly £200 on groceries, much of which I didn't need. Granted, ~50% was booze, but booze I might not have bought normally.

To top it off, in the surreal stakes, the delivery man was a wizened old midget (well, not quite a midget, about 5'5", but a midget to me) with only one hand. He had a hook for the other, which was really cool when he was carrying the plastic bags in. It was like being waited on by a pirate.
He was also somewhat deaf and had a west country accent.

Strange times.

Though, I must stress, there was no Tuscan milk, whole or otherwise, included with this delivery.


* Let this be a lesson - don't shop when drunk. You wouldn't do it in the actual supermarket, so don't do it online.
Unless you want retired pirates to deliver your shopping.