welsh's Incredible adventures - from cranky women

c0ldst33ltrs4u said:
(valeu!)!
What does that mean, exactly? I am asking because in romanian it is an exclamation expressing surprise and awe.

Its an informal way of saying thanks. :P

AssMan said:
I thought about what my 86 grandmother used to say, "Thing I hate about wearing leather pants is how it chaffs my thighs!"

Your story is great. Flying like Lucy in the Sky With Diamonds.... Showing your bright virgin ass to everyone... The only problem is to mention what your grandmother used to say. :eek:
 
What is it about lesbians that arouses a man? Is it the idea of female bodies entwined doing things with their hands and tongues? Is it that the only thing better than a sexy woman is two (or more sexy women)?

Are we that simple?

Or is it the possibility of a world that is beyond our gender to comprehend, a naughty little world filled with soft garments and.... well... you know... .

The allure of women's sexuality that we neither understand nor could join. Or can we? And maybe it's that wish, the fantasy wish, that goes to the arrogance of the male ego that makes the fantasy real.

And so began the test.

It was really simple really.

Two women engaged in various forms of sexual naughtiness and my reaction.

"Let us begin." Spoke the older woman near me.

I could not touch, I could not move. My hands and legs had been tied down. I was trapped, captured, immobilized. Powerless. In bonds of satin and silk.

Two women, a blond and a red head dove from the side of the pool and swam towards me. The only sounds the splashing of water as the other women watched. When they to the near side they climbed up.

They had not been wearing swimsuits and the garments they wore now clung tightly to their bodies, a second skin over their breasts.

They smiled and winked at me,

(My faithful friend now scream! "Yes yes, Lesbians, and they want you!")

But of course I couldn't move.

and they began to kiss.

(and the faithful friend, "Here it comes baby!")

ANd I could fell myself throbbing.

("I'm going to pop," said the faithful friend)

And perhaps so could the older woman who put her hand around me. "Quick,"She said, "We got a gusher!"

("Whheeeeee ha ha ha !" laughed the faithful friend! "It's a ripper!")

That's when they brought out the machine. A giant whirling mass of gears and wheels that moved and hissed and growled like some technical monster. They wheeled it out on a cart, and removed the large plastic vacuum hose and, without any ceremony or appreciation or the slightest respect, put it on my faithful friend.

I thought the suction would kill me.

THe woman released her hand as the nozzle came down.

("WHeee!!!! Cried the friend, now not caring on where the seed was sown).

Why are the young so anxious, so impatient, so restless? Because they are dams of sexual energy, stored up floods waiting for an opportunity to burst.

And the vacuum took it all.

ANd it wouldn't let me go.

My eyes, dazed, looked at the woman now fondling their bosoms.
"Hey, Nice melons, can I squeeze them for freshness"

WHACK!

I felt the whip come down."Bitch! That hurt."

Whack. "Respect!"

And the women began to fondle each other.

"Hey, let me feel if those are real or not."

WHack! "Respect the bosom."

"Let me put the other one in my mouth, double the fun."

WHACK! "You don't understand the complexities of the breast."

I could hear the vacuum machine begin it's whirling and grinding and hissing, just as I knew the faithful friend was screaming, "Round Two baby!"

And Round Two led to Round three.

By this time the girls had begum to move down, the clothes were off.

Like the first two rounds, the third was quick.

"Hey how about un-tieing me and I can help out."

Whack- "Men are unnecessary."

"Smells good to me."

Whack, "The clitoris is the gateway to pleasure, not a hamburger."

"I like fish"

Whack, "The vagina is a flower not a fish."

"YOu know I hear that the alphabet pattern is best."

WHACK!!! "Cunnilingus is an art."

"If you get tired of fish you could try a piece of my sausage."

WHACK. "The vagina is superior to the penis"

The machine whirling, the vacuum sucking ("Wheee!!!! THis is fun!") CHUG CHUG CHUG hissed the machine.

I could see my sperms going through a long tube and into a long cylinder. The older woman would dip a long rounded syringe like device and withdraw a sample of my sperm. Through my dazed eyes (now having shot three loads in less than 15 minutes) I saw her approach one of the girls on a lounge chair nearby and put the syringe between the girls legs.

"YOu know I could do that without the machinery."

Whack, "Men are not necessary when technology is more efficient.

As if on cue, the two lesbians performing before me turned on their instruments.

Rounds 4,5,6, and 7 were also quick.

"How about a little horizontal bop."

Whack. I was losing consciousness of what was being said to me. Hell I wasn't sure if I was even speaking intelligbly.

"How about we try different positions for added pleasure?"

Whack- "Your efforts are neither necessary nor humorous."

"I can make mine vibrate too."

Whack- "Intercourse is violence."

"No danger of electric shock?"

Whack, "Men are the danger."

"I don't need batteries."

Whack. "We don't need you."

Whack

WHack

Whack

I couldn't help it. Just as my faithful friend had finally betrayed me, neither could my tongue resist trying to convince these girls that I could be a more active participant.

Each suggestion was punished. Clearly they didn't care.

By the end of the night I had lost count of how many times I had orgasmed, how much seed they had taken from me, how many times I had been hit, how many red welts were on my body. There just wasn't any juice left. Sore and abused, I soon became unconscious.

I don't know how long I slept, but they woke me with a splash of water. They fed me through a tube something like babyfood, and then they cleaned me up.

Then two new girls came out, and began kissing.

"No more," I moaned.

But my faithful friend bounced back to attention.

ANd I heard the whirling and coughing and spasming of the vacuum machine as they wheeled it again. ANd while my mind recoiled at the theft of my seed, my body could not resist the spectacle of lesbians.

"Hey how about this time we try it with a guy?" I said.

Whack- "men are not necessary."

"Why?" I pleaded, "Why are you doing this?"

"Procreation"
 
You know, my Geography teacher had serious PMS and told to all of the guys in the class something along those lines. You are not necessary, you are only a sperm bank (not this clear but you know its down there in her psyche).
 
Procreation.

That was what it was about. Not pleasure or ego, but procreation.

How many days did it last, how much sperm did they take?

It lasted

I would be awakened with a splash of water, fed some kind of babyfood like substance and then the show would begin again. Lesbians, having lesbian sex, and I would get aroused, and then the vacume cleaner would descend on my worn out penis.

It became so formal I didn't have to say something, just open my mouth to say something like,

"How about a little steak to go with that fish."

Whack!

But I learned a couple of things in Sappho's Retreat, surrounded by beautiful lesbians, who touched and caressed each other, all beyond my touch.

Firstly, I didn't know enough about cunnilingus.

Indeed, there was something to be learned from these women about going down. A man who could master cunnilingus could be a master of women, because that's what these women wanted.

YOu got to eat pussy and enjoy it.

And so I thought of something my old 92 year old grandmother had said to me once in the farm while we were milking cows.

"Sonny, nothing gets my bones going like a chick giving me head. If you learn anything, love the pussy but tantilize the clit."

And perhaps that has been the reward of that evening. Ever since I have made a career of learning the appropriate skill, talent and ability to excellently muff dive.

"Hey Babe, you know it's all just foreplay. How about going all the way?"

Whack

Secondly, I learned another important lesson. The penis is not as good a friend as you think.

The penis has only one goal, to get laid, to swim in a greased hole, to shoot it's seed, to be satisfied. Not even to perpetuate. It doesn't care about you, it doesn't care about what's good. It doesn't care about other women or men.

It doesn't care about anything.

It doesn't care about babies or people. It doesn't care if screwing that girl will send you to jail, or risk a social disease, or cost you a marriage or a job or a best friend. It doesn't care about any of that.

This thought struck me as the giant vacume tube decended on my aroused penis despite my own horror.

No, the one eyed wonder worm only wants one thing. Orgasms.

And left uncontrolled will do what ever it can to get that.

It is not always faithful nor your friend. You can't trust your dick.

Because it really doesn't care about you, nor even the species. Not a bit. It just wants to be satisfied. That's all it wants

And that's the problem of why a man can't be ruled by his dick.

Maybe that's how we are hardwired. Keep it simple. The purpose is procreation, the perpetuation of the species. We are all just salmon swimming up a river to spawn and die.

"Hey, I got ..."

Whack.


ANd that was the third lesson.

What do women need from men - sperm.

That's all they need.

Everything else is optional.

Because women are as hardwired as men, it's about procreation.

ANd that's why they kept me, tied up in bondage, a vacume clearner on my penis, sucking the juices of me dry. There was nothing I could do about. Perhaps that's the fate of our gender.

And they did it until they had their fill of me and didn't need me anymore.

ANd when they didn't, they cast me out of that palace of pussy.

I blacked out as normal. The sun beating on me, the lesbians using one of their electric toys, and the vacume cleaner buzzing, and it all just went black.

When I woke I was in the street, in San Francisco, naked as the day as I was born, and sore where it hurt most.
 
Is there going to be a police station orgy? :roll:
Or maybe another encounter with the gay guys who got locked up after the lesbians raided the rave? :lol:
This sure is fun!
 
welsh said:
And so I thought of something my old 92 year old grandmother had said to me once in the farm while we were milking cows.

"Sonny, nothing gets my bones going like a chick giving me head. If you learn anything, love the pussy but tantilize the clit."

:eek:



c0ldst33ltrs4u said:
another encounter with the gay guys who got locked up after the lesbians raided the rave?

I think Welsh is going to meet the "Gladiators" again. He gave us a hint in the last sentence.

welsh said:
pulled up behind me.

What I really wanted to know is what happened with the aliens. :?
 
It's been hard to tell this story.... but every story needs an ending.

So there I was, in the gutter.

Limp as wet noodle, my body too tired to move. I had been used, degraded and thrown away. Now, exhausted, my body resisted my will to get up and move. I tried to get up, using the wiring of the fence to pull myself up, but it was no good, I collapsed.

And for what?

What had led me to this sad state.

It was all so surreal. Like a bad drug experience....

To think it had all begun with some attempt to pick up a girl who turned out to have a bigger schlong then I did.

An attempt to escape a gay bar,
a stripping,
a lecture,
the discovery of gay history,
a rescue.

A pale moon over San Francisco only to be dumped into a pool owned by an underground secret lesbian movement.

My salvation had led to enslavement. I had escaped being sodomized by a giant ape for being used as a personal sperm bank by criminal lesbians.

My sperm exhausted I now lay, pale, lifeless.

Like a used salmon floating down a river, I lay naked and lifeless in the gutter of San Francisco.

In my mind I had a dim thought. At least it was over.

But fate can be a cruel wolf.

I heard the siren, and I tried to move, but I was to weak. My arms and legs now useless.

The car pulled up behind me, and I could see two cops come out. I could watch them through though in my eyes it all seemed so dream like.

Perhaps it was the after affects of the drugs.

One of the cops was a woman, the other a man. To me they looked like Nazi stormtroopers, heavily armed with sidearms and clubs, and capable of restraint.

One of them prodded me with the club, perhaps to see if I was dead and conscious.

The other leaned over me and asked. "What happened to you son. Who did this to you? How did you end up like this?"

I tried to answer, to give an answer that might explain what had happened, of the tragic consequences.

But all I could answer was the one word that made sense.

"Sex."

- TO BE CONTINUED-
 
Used salmon? :roll: You are losing the touch.... I was expecting something more elaborated.

welsh said:
- TO BE CONTINUED-

Now that's what I call a good ending... So Welsh where are the aliens you mentioned before? Err.... wait a minute. Siren. Stormtroopers. :twisted:

Don't let us wait another month. :evil:
 
Actually I thought a used salmon was most appropriate. The whole idea of a salmon's life is to go up this fucking river, jump over waterfalls, evade damns, spawn and die.

If the biological imperative is merely procreation, after that, we die. Note that men tend to die earlier than women when they are no longer suitable as father figures (see Tony Randall) and that women stop being able to procreate at mid-life, then their bodies rapidly deteriorate- though apparently not as badly as men.

Perhaps the purpose of our life is merely procreation. If that's the case then this character, who has been essentially robbed of his sperm, is basically a used salmon, no?

By the way, the ending is not as strange as the rest of the story- this part was just a wrap up and reminder of earlier episodes.
 
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