Mortal Kombat Annihilation was an excellent movie. It was so awesome that I wanted to gouge my eyes out with a butterknife,stick them up my ass,and then shit,so when I shit I would shit on my eyes.
I remember when I rented House of the Dead. I never heard of Uwe Boll,so I didn't know what to expect. When I saw the fight scene where the girl jumps in the air,shoots the shotgun,and it slows down to watch the bullets...I almost vomited. Then I saw the zombie catapult in the air,clearly noticing the springboard and I wanted to die right then and there.
I thought to myself,"There is no hope for mankind.I should kill myself right now." Moments later while I held the razorblade to my wrist it dawned on me. An epiphany if you will. Uwe Boll deserves to die,not I. But killing him now will not undo all the horrible atrocities that he has commited against mankind. That was when I decided to invent a time machine in order to stop Uwe Boll from ever being born.
I have watched every time travel movie,researched Einsteins theories on time travel,and I even ran around the world real fast like in "Superman: The Movie" all in hopes of accomplishing this daunting task. But to no avail I have not found out how to travel through time,so at long last I have came to one conclusion. Mankind is so fucked.