Attack Of The Mini Games!
Attack Of The Mini Games!
It is tradition on PC platforms to indulge the sweat equity aficionados.
Pardon the 'wind up' , but this pitch will first, grub around in the dark, dank underworld of modern consumer electronics.
I am referring to bugs. No claim or inference of bugs is meant or implied concerning the title inspiring this thread. I expound on the patterns of behavior induced by such pillars of the patch as Interplay, and from what I hear, Bethesda S. (*)
(*)WolfMyth at:
http://www.nma-fallout.com/forum/viewtopic.php?t=7969&start=100
An aside: the alleged bug infestation in Bethesda past titles may be on par with Interplay. I can not honor my backhanded generality, or any concept of fair play with a tray of pinned specimens layed out and labeled by genus species. This is all antidotal regurgitation that divines with the 'green glow' that a part of the FO tradition is sure to live on in Bethesda S. QA.
Bugs.
And more bugs.
Even after the heroic back fires, I mean back burning, to stop the waves of errors from "killing" the game, many problems evade a harried QA staff.
If these virtual critters survive the second (or last) patch, the bugs become a defacto part of the game. The 'best' QA intentions ring hollow, and it's up to the gamer to line all their - drivers - in a row, and save early and often.
The tradition is so strong that some reviewers of the " Last - Tomb Raider " featured screen shots of xbox memory errors - screens of death - a Microsoft platform true to it's Microsoft roots. Each institutionalized error is a - humble - testimony of the fallibility of man,
a witnessing of 'original sin" and the divine promise of immaculate upgrade 'in the sweet by and by". Bugs that survive the patches are golden, and sanctify the marketing success of the "beta" rush,
and secure the 'bases' of the lowest common denominator.
It is almost credulous that bean counters, time and motion sons of a ... Taylor, and THE market'eers have special cells in their spread sheets that concoct the ratio of documented defects to unit sales over a specified marketing time window: t = $ - time equals money - . A sublime and lucrative mile stone of money making efficiency. Time saved on by passing bugs is money in the bank. Playability and compatability become "states of mind' and are open to interpretation, SPIN manipulation, and other time honored misdirection via smoke and mirrors. Implied features, playability and system compatability are fundamental hooks. The consumer is teased by the promise but "blue balled" by the execution. The consumer becomes an addict of the illusionary dream of a 'better" tomorrow: That the gameplay will not constantly crash the system, that the game installlation will NOT involve an F-DISK.
Now for the pitch.
I detect ... opportunity ... that would capitalize on the hardened hands and last stand ferocity, soothing the bruised psyche's, of the stalwart PC veteran.
I detect ... opportunity ... for this international title. There is fertile compost to be turned in this pasture of gamers to be milked. It may be time to tweak the nose, and, or, pull the teets of the ""High"" Grammarians and their incense stench of chanted, candle lit, orthodoxies.
Colloquial speech is a vital tool in literature. Having the characters say ..whatever, in 'real time', or as that character would say ... whatever, is important in breathing 'real life' in - word - puppets. Colloquial speech prevents the more wordy and undisciplined authors from stuffing uncharacteristic words, philosophies, and arcane agendas in a convenient mouth rather than structuring and executing a logical flow of people and places.
Ah, sorry, no road map here. I can't practise as I bleat, but you can 'trust me' that there is some form of modernism that is not playing the same 40 phrases on fast rotation, more inclined to merchandising to channel surfing attention spans than communicating in full spectrum, analogue, color. You can 'trust' this line because you read 'it' on the internet, yes indeed.
I propose a pandering to the "hands on" spirit of PC self -fixation.
I propose a solution of a mere, perceptual problem, in the forever sliding scale of English Grammar, from being profiled as a 'bug'.
PC gamers have been trained to deal with flaws, why not use those virtual muscles to second guess the authors and up the ante' of
following the plot line.
I propose for your kind consideration an "English Regional Dialect- SIM".
Perhaps it could be 'sold' as a vanity editor along the lines of the
photo fun of "Cosmo's Makeover". Perhaps it could be a translating mini game that would compare the original copy written content to the whimsical associations, the editing, of the gamer. Vary too far, and you break the plot chain, and your intellectual conceit withers on the dialogue tree.
Text editing competitions would ensue: the best mimicry of say ... Hemingway or Faulkner, or Dickens, or Adams, or the leprous representative of the seedy, tainted shadows of decayed, forgotten and inbred horror of pulp publication, H.P. Lovecraft.
So all flavors of drama and comedy would be allowed to 'compare and contrast' their ego's, in the best (and brightest) English Literature Academic tradition. The highest prize would reward the most HORRIFIC
bastardization of the story line where not even the fig leaf of "parody" could cover the shame of self indulgent display.
And in the realm of self indulgence you can trust my experience.
You can 'trust' this line because you read 'it' on the internet, yes indeed.
4too
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I do like the screen shots.
4too - 2
Added WolfMyth link.
4too - 3