The Shittiest Story's Ever.

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FYI: Pepto Bismol will cause black shit.
 
The_Vault_Dweller said:
-Thinks: "Damn I have to get him off me, but I cant hurt his feelings since he's being nice. What do I do?! I know..."
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Meany; I'm never going to be nice to you again!!!

The_Vault_Dweller said:
(masterbates sincerely),
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Gross.[/quote]
 
The_Vault_Dweller said:
Some days during the summer while I was in High School I noticed during a particularly lazy week I would shit black. I kept it in mind cause it was so weird...

Other times at tumultuous periods in my life I would notice I would sometimes shit green. This I eventually forgot till...

On my vacation to Florida (new places make me nervous) I shat yellow! After putting all that info together I came up with this hypothesis.
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Just out of curiousity but... you wouldnt happen to have taken any photos of these lovely colored poops now would you? I'm rather enticed ;-).

E gads, after posting this, I saw calculon's photo and take back the request...
 
Luke said:
Stay tuned for his second story.
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:D

-
Anyway, one day I was eating lunch in middle school. I was in a covered area that had a building above me. Up there pipes could be seen that had little birds nesting on them. As I was eating a breadroll I saw something white quickly enter and leave my range of vision. Thinking nothing of it I bit into the bread...to taste something horrible. I suddenly realised whatever it was that fell, fell on my bread and I ate it. Thinking it may be bird shoot I looked up. Sure enough, a small wren (a common brown bird found all over North America) was staring down at me...I swear it was smiling!
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On the bright side multiple asians I know tell me eating bird shoot is good for your immune system. (Asians believe many animal parts have healing/empowering properties)

(still feels sick to his stomach when he tells that story),
The Vault Dweller
 
You seem to like the subject Vault_Dweller, so here, present (I'd say it isn't worksafe) for you. Bucketloads of fun for a connaisseur like yourself!
 
This is an interesting theory though, so a way to test it using the scientific method is to eat a fairly consistent diet of the same foods for a month and expose yourself to varying levels of stress. Then repeat the experiment and eliminate as many x-factors as possible.
 
Scrapper said:
This is an interesting theory though, so a way to test it using the scientific method is to eat a fairly consistent diet of the same foods for a month and expose yourself to varying levels of stress. Then repeat the experiment and eliminate as many x-factors as possible.
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Finally someone takes me seriously...however I do believe the link posted here has much more scientific information and is probably more true.

I would test my hypothesis, but Im too lazy and dont like the thought of myself being a test subject. (the stress hypothesis)

I wouldnt mind trying the food idea and eating lots of leafy greens to make green shit.

I'll consider it...

Sincerely,
The Vault Dweller
 
Oh my fucking god, they had to mention Giardia. I had that once...my mother said I literally painted my crib. Hurt like hell too according to her. I once saw my cousin pull pink bubblegum from a turd. He didn't eat it though.
 
SkynetV4 said:
Oh my fucking god, they had to mention Giardia. I had that once...my mother said I literally painted my crib.
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Your family was so cheap that you had to use your own shit instead of fingerpaint as a child? How horrid...

:lol: ,
The Vault Dweller
 
*suddenly realisesthis thread is very uniteresting and that he has a patrick o brian book downstairs tha he has not read yet, and thus runs down to read it*
 
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