Allure of the mustache

zegh8578

zegh8578

Keeper of the trout
Orderite
If you are a man, you have considered growing a mustache; and the only real matter of contention is how much you ever considered it - was it a fleeting moment, was it a long life dream? And if you ever grew one - was it not just a beard shave, in a joking mood? Maybe you left a Hitler-stache, selfied it, showed your friends, laughed, then shaved the rest off - OR, maybe you admired someone's beautiful stache - like Tom Selleck - but even that takes a bit of... guts, right? I've seen a lot of pics in pic-threads, and no young normal dude sports a stache - exceptions are usually lost bets or short-lived experiments.
I walked around with a stache, and everybody hated me, so I changed it back - but the POWER I FELT was undeniable. I never forgot it.

A pattern I noticed right away was that - women universally hated the idea, flat out - just no, don't, stop, take it away - while most of my guy friends were mostly concerned with my mustache not being... earned enough - I can't grow it big, it was still not fully committed - and I whimped out in the end - but think

whenever someone compliments a FINE mustache - it is almost always a man complimenting another man, hell - even if you're a homophobe, that is one of the few exceptions where you can fully utter your devoted admiration to another man's appearance - that is one good looking mustache, right there!

and therein lie the key

the mustache is a signal - it takes many forms, many roles, but all of them signal self-reliance and independence. The mustache first and foremost say "I do not care if the ladies do not find me attractive, so much so, I seal it with this monstrous growth." which translates further to either "I am taken, I am a family man - behold my dad stache!" or "I am too busy being powerful, than to lower myself to human matters!" or "I am gay, behold how gay I am!" each mustache speaks differently, each carries an accent, a subtle note to a story; like any other visual cue we exhibit, like hairstyle, clothes, facial expressions - we want to say something - but the mustache will not accept a fraud, you cannot bluff yourself to a stache.

You carry that stache with pride, if it truly speaks what you intend for it to say - if you truly are a man of few worries, one who can AFFORD to allot *only* the upper lip for dense growth - a *focal point* detracting even from your eyes - a mark in the middle of your face, transforming you to such a degree, it was often the go to for criminal fugitives - grow a stache, or shave it.
You essentially *mar* your own appearance, in such a way - with such a conviction - that your fellow man will admire you, and if you are that mustache-wearing man - not even that is of concern to you; for you are beyond and above the mere search for approval, and should someone congratulate you on your amazing stache - and tell you how inspirational your face is to them; it only serves for an oportunity for you, to grant them a little knowing nod, one that will warm their tender hearts, and give *them* the sense of approval, of having been acknowledged fully... by a man with a fine mustache.
 
Every word of the OP is true, top contender for the best post of 2023. I think moustache was always the dream, but for the longest time I held back as men often do, insecure, a slave to the whims of my fellow man. I believe I had ended a relationship that had gone on for too long -- one that explicitly stated "no moustaches allowed" -- when a sudden sense of liberation overwhelmed me: my face, my choice, my life, my sweet stache. It has varied in composition over the years but has left my upper lip only on a few occasions; just to see if I could still live without it. The signal it emits seems to be ambiuous however, I have set my moustache to "DILLIGAF" but sometimes it gets interpreted as "dick smoker". For some reason women put up with it, I never understood why, maybe they think that the complete disregard for facial appearances translates into confidence and self-esteem. What a joke
 
RexExitium said:
For some reason women put up with it, I never understood why, maybe they think that the complete disregard for facial appearances translates into confidence and self-esteem. What a joke
Click to expand...

That's the full circle, you're Tom Selleck now :V
 
You think it is great until you eat soup and get that shit all over your face. This must be why they did handelbars but those looks gay.
 
if handlebars are too gay for you just freeze your soup into a soup popsicle (soupsicle?) and walk around town sucking on that, it's a win-win
 
I really don't care. I usually only shave for work (i.e., for work safety or for work with clients (much rarer)) or for the bed activities (long hair/beard may get in the way of certain deeds). When I don't do either, I grow full beard like a caveman (or Karl Marx, whichever you prefer).
For work safety there can be two issues with beard:
- Can get caught in machinery (on the internet you usually see "wrecked" videos of people's flying garments getting caught, but it may as well be hair/beard)
- Your breathing mask might not be a skintight fit, which isn't good. Of course, nowadays there are copious amounts of dumdums who work in unsafe environment and breath toxic fumes likes it's the best thing in the world, but then again I never hear of them having long lifespans either. Of course this only matters if there is such work safety issue at your job, not some covids or similar fake dangers.

With mustache only it all depends on the size. You could always go for the Führer's style, very compact and practical :cool:

What society "thinks" (can it think?) doesn't matter at all. When I'm cleanly shaved, there are folks who say I need a beard, when I have beard there are folks who say I need to shave etc. Zero consensus, all dumdum.
 
If I shave my beard, I look like a pedo with my Wolf moustache...

Considering I work with kids, that doesn't bode well.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top