Alright, you friggin' mongrels, this is alec time! Listen up! W00t!
Some of you might, and some of you might not know that alec is in fact a distinguished author in real life. That's right: I write. Just about anything, really. I've published two volumes of poetry (awarded with prizes, by the way) and a novel which kinda sorta sucked because I was too young to make any sense. I've been a journalist for the Justice Department of Belgium and I've contributed to numerous publications. I'm big in a small way. Yeah, that's right: I'm more than a creep and a self-declared foot-fetishist. I actually do stuff, contrary to many others on these boards.
Since November 2004 I've got a new contract with my publisher. He paid me 3000 euros in advance. For a new novel. Needless to say I used that money to pay for drugs, booze and whores (with delicious feet), but lately my publisher has been nagging my head off about that new book. He wants some result. He wants copy, dawgunnit. He wants a potential bestseller that will rock his arse off. And his cock. If he's got one of those, that is.
I started writing a novel in the summer of 2006, but seeing I didn't really like it (it was so experimental) and being down and depressed and drunk most of the time, I deleted it in January 2007. Trust me: that was a wise decision. No one would have given a flying fuck about the book. Nevertheless, today it's April 6th and since I don't have the 3000 euros anymore, I've got to do something quickly. ('Quickly' was the most important word in that sentence.) Even if I don't come up with a potential bestseller, I have to come up with something, some sort of project, to keep my publisher content. So I'm going to do a 'Perec'. Right before his death, Georges Perec, one of the best French writers ever, tried to write a novel in only 52 days. He died before he could finish it, though, but his scheme of writing a book in merely 52 days became quite famous and is well-documented.
Wooz, our beloved and - might I say - very talented friend has given me the green light on this project of mine. Beginning on the 10th of April, good ol' wishy-washy alec, your's truly, will try to write a 200 page novel in a mere 52 days. Ridiculous? Of course. But nonetheless, I will try it and you mongrels will be my witnesses.
What will this novel be about? About myself, of course. What did you expect? I will try to fill 200 pages with the exciting adventures that have taken place between the end of December 2006 and the end of March 2007. A turbulent period in my life, mind you. A period of emo, depression, loss and heart-ache, but also a period of lust, drug abuse, suicidal drinking and foot worship the likes you've never seen before.
I will start this ludicrous project of mine on Tuesday the 10th of April 2007 because I promised my publisher I'd send him a book on the first of June 2007, and that leaves me exactly 52 days to accomplish this impossible task. 52 days. Perec. Remember?
Since it is practically impossible to write 200 pages of literature in a mere 52 days, I have decided to do a heavily illustrated novel, illustrated by myself by the way, so that it will be easier to fill those 200 pages.
Since it would be insane to try and fill a 200 pager with realistic drawings, I have decided to use one of my favourite characters to be the protagonist of this book. Meet my bean-shaped alter-ego:
This character will depict good ol' wishy-washy alec. And all other characters in the book will have, more or less, the exact same shape. Stupid? Judge later. I might have lost 50% of my self-esteem during the last few months, the remaining 50% outweighs most human's self-esteem. So, fuck yes, I can do this. And I'll prove it. Starting on the 10th of April, I will publish, ON A DAILY BASIS, a new chapter of my exciting new novel. And after only 52 days I will send that manuscript to my publisher and see whether he wants to publish it or not.
Awesome! Indeed.
A few remarks on this insane project of mine:
[1] I am writing the original text in Dutch, since I'm Flemish and Dutch is my native language. I will translate the text in English for you mongrels, but do not expect it to be world literature. I am still not as fluent in English as I am in Dutch, so bear that in mind. It will be comprehensible, though. Trust me.
[2] Do not hesitate to post your comments in this thread. In fact, I would highly appreciate your personal comments. I will try to make this project as attractive and interesting as possble, but do not expect any wonders. I only will have 52 days to complete it. Be reasonable.
[3] Although this project of mine is no fan-art, Wooz has given me the green light in publishing this project on these boards. Fallout will most certainly appear at some point in this project, but do not expect more than a mere reference of some sort. This project will deal with me and my life in the first place. That should be interesting enough, though.
[4] The chapters will not appear in chronological order. That is because that's my way of working. I always start with the chapter that I want to write most of all and so on. Then again, all chapters will, more or less, be seperate unities. Anecdotal. I trust no-one will really give a shit about the chronology in the long run. It'll make sense. I usually organize the chapters afterwards.
[5] For the religious, moral types amongst you: expect pornographic, unholy contents. My bean-shaped alter-ego will fuck bean-shaped gals. He will curse the heavens and play with himself whilst looking at porn. He will utter things that you do not like. Deal with it. Wooz agreed on this project, so so should you.
[6] There will be a lot of illustrations in this thread. That means it'll get heavy on some of you mongrel's computers. Most probably, this'll become as heavy as the "Who do you think is most sexy/no nudity thread". Bear that in mind when you click this thread.
[7] AT THE FOOT OF THE LADDER is a worktitle. That means, that the title might change over time. It happens, trust me
[8] I'm on the dole right now, so theoretically I have all the time in the world to complete this impossible task. I am writing letters to companies, though, so do not freak out if one of these days I'm going to tell you that I've gotten a new job and won't be able to complete the project. I will try not to get a new job before the end of May, but one never knows.
As of today, I have approximately 4 more days to get this shit ready and going. Wish me luck. I'll need it.
-- alec, crazy as hell
Some of you might, and some of you might not know that alec is in fact a distinguished author in real life. That's right: I write. Just about anything, really. I've published two volumes of poetry (awarded with prizes, by the way) and a novel which kinda sorta sucked because I was too young to make any sense. I've been a journalist for the Justice Department of Belgium and I've contributed to numerous publications. I'm big in a small way. Yeah, that's right: I'm more than a creep and a self-declared foot-fetishist. I actually do stuff, contrary to many others on these boards.
Since November 2004 I've got a new contract with my publisher. He paid me 3000 euros in advance. For a new novel. Needless to say I used that money to pay for drugs, booze and whores (with delicious feet), but lately my publisher has been nagging my head off about that new book. He wants some result. He wants copy, dawgunnit. He wants a potential bestseller that will rock his arse off. And his cock. If he's got one of those, that is.
I started writing a novel in the summer of 2006, but seeing I didn't really like it (it was so experimental) and being down and depressed and drunk most of the time, I deleted it in January 2007. Trust me: that was a wise decision. No one would have given a flying fuck about the book. Nevertheless, today it's April 6th and since I don't have the 3000 euros anymore, I've got to do something quickly. ('Quickly' was the most important word in that sentence.) Even if I don't come up with a potential bestseller, I have to come up with something, some sort of project, to keep my publisher content. So I'm going to do a 'Perec'. Right before his death, Georges Perec, one of the best French writers ever, tried to write a novel in only 52 days. He died before he could finish it, though, but his scheme of writing a book in merely 52 days became quite famous and is well-documented.
Wooz, our beloved and - might I say - very talented friend has given me the green light on this project of mine. Beginning on the 10th of April, good ol' wishy-washy alec, your's truly, will try to write a 200 page novel in a mere 52 days. Ridiculous? Of course. But nonetheless, I will try it and you mongrels will be my witnesses.
What will this novel be about? About myself, of course. What did you expect? I will try to fill 200 pages with the exciting adventures that have taken place between the end of December 2006 and the end of March 2007. A turbulent period in my life, mind you. A period of emo, depression, loss and heart-ache, but also a period of lust, drug abuse, suicidal drinking and foot worship the likes you've never seen before.
I will start this ludicrous project of mine on Tuesday the 10th of April 2007 because I promised my publisher I'd send him a book on the first of June 2007, and that leaves me exactly 52 days to accomplish this impossible task. 52 days. Perec. Remember?
Since it is practically impossible to write 200 pages of literature in a mere 52 days, I have decided to do a heavily illustrated novel, illustrated by myself by the way, so that it will be easier to fill those 200 pages.
Since it would be insane to try and fill a 200 pager with realistic drawings, I have decided to use one of my favourite characters to be the protagonist of this book. Meet my bean-shaped alter-ego:
This character will depict good ol' wishy-washy alec. And all other characters in the book will have, more or less, the exact same shape. Stupid? Judge later. I might have lost 50% of my self-esteem during the last few months, the remaining 50% outweighs most human's self-esteem. So, fuck yes, I can do this. And I'll prove it. Starting on the 10th of April, I will publish, ON A DAILY BASIS, a new chapter of my exciting new novel. And after only 52 days I will send that manuscript to my publisher and see whether he wants to publish it or not.
Awesome! Indeed.
A few remarks on this insane project of mine:
[1] I am writing the original text in Dutch, since I'm Flemish and Dutch is my native language. I will translate the text in English for you mongrels, but do not expect it to be world literature. I am still not as fluent in English as I am in Dutch, so bear that in mind. It will be comprehensible, though. Trust me.
[2] Do not hesitate to post your comments in this thread. In fact, I would highly appreciate your personal comments. I will try to make this project as attractive and interesting as possble, but do not expect any wonders. I only will have 52 days to complete it. Be reasonable.
[3] Although this project of mine is no fan-art, Wooz has given me the green light in publishing this project on these boards. Fallout will most certainly appear at some point in this project, but do not expect more than a mere reference of some sort. This project will deal with me and my life in the first place. That should be interesting enough, though.
[4] The chapters will not appear in chronological order. That is because that's my way of working. I always start with the chapter that I want to write most of all and so on. Then again, all chapters will, more or less, be seperate unities. Anecdotal. I trust no-one will really give a shit about the chronology in the long run. It'll make sense. I usually organize the chapters afterwards.
[5] For the religious, moral types amongst you: expect pornographic, unholy contents. My bean-shaped alter-ego will fuck bean-shaped gals. He will curse the heavens and play with himself whilst looking at porn. He will utter things that you do not like. Deal with it. Wooz agreed on this project, so so should you.
[6] There will be a lot of illustrations in this thread. That means it'll get heavy on some of you mongrel's computers. Most probably, this'll become as heavy as the "Who do you think is most sexy/no nudity thread". Bear that in mind when you click this thread.
[7] AT THE FOOT OF THE LADDER is a worktitle. That means, that the title might change over time. It happens, trust me
[8] I'm on the dole right now, so theoretically I have all the time in the world to complete this impossible task. I am writing letters to companies, though, so do not freak out if one of these days I'm going to tell you that I've gotten a new job and won't be able to complete the project. I will try not to get a new job before the end of May, but one never knows.
As of today, I have approximately 4 more days to get this shit ready and going. Wish me luck. I'll need it.
-- alec, crazy as hell
Well I'm a writer also, still not published thought, but still trying. I'm from Poland, so I write in Polish... But well, good luck. I pretty like your idea with 2nd person singular... but I don't know. For sure you must have quite crazy publisher 
