Official NMA General Shitposting Thread

He's just celebrating 9/11.

 

Russia and Chyna have got to be shaking in their boots after seeing this.

 

Sloppy AI.

 

What does that have to do with anything? We've been getting our asses kicked by people in sandals and pajamas since 'Nam.

 

Mobucks talking about that alternate timeline he is in again.

 

One of the main reasons for American withdrawal from Vietnam was because American soldiers and civilians weren’t comfortable with how brutally we were ass-kicking them, and how much more ass-kicking would be needed to wipe out the Viet Cong.

 

There's this viking story I heard - totally anecdotal - totally incidental - but there was this one viking dude, who had gotten in some trouble with the local earl. Apparently he was boastful, arrogant or something - and now men were coming to test his mettle - to make an example of him - and he wasn't prepared for that - so he ran!
He fled his hut - long before they reached it - he ran down to a wide fjord, and he swam right across the damn thing - long strokes, till he reached the other side, absolutely exhausted.
Nearby was a small hut - a little abode owned by a working logger and his two adult sons.
"Hurry!" he beckoned his sons - "See to the man!" and so they did - discovering who he was; knowing from rumors abound - "Hold him!" the father said, as he got the axe from the shed.
The brave viking could only recieve his end, as he was separated from his body; the two young men already preparing a deep grave, right there on the beach; body and head thrown in, buried, and never spoken of again.

True story!

K, so I heard another story,
This one is much more recent, and therefore a lot more fun!

So - we're probably in the mid 1800s - we're in the central part of Norway, and some local farmers have gathered with the lensman's office ("region-man" ie. "sherriff") complaining about a group of travellers, travelling through the area, doing the usual - asking for work for lodging as well as very likely stealing, and idunno, being smelly - so the lensman goes "trouble thine weary heads no longer" and seeks the band of travellers out - as always, a complete generational little pack, from old to young - he took them to a shore, he had prepared a boat, and he shared with them the most lamentable news; they were to depart these lands - across the deep fjord - and so they accepted, and boarded the small boat.
He then rowed them to the middle, where he raised a net, threw it on top of them all, for then to beat them with a stick untill there was no movement left.

LIKE, you can say "is it true?" but then I also heard of the "Heads on spikes turned outwards are a warning to travellers, while heads on spikes turned INwards are a warning to citizens!"-rule also applied around these parts. That's of course before the travellers-mass-murder - but *after* the viking impromptu beheading!

There's also some interesting stuff about the difference between Swedish and Norwegian beheading-axes, their shape, purpose and method - and philosophical differences that divided them, but I dont remember now :v

 

"Dear Brothers and Sisters,
Dear Enemies and Friends,

Why are we all so alone here? All we need is a little more hope, a little more joy.
All we need is a little more light, a little less weight, a little more freedom. If we were an army, and if we believed that we were an army, and we believed that everyone was scared like little lost children in their grown up clothes and poses;
so we ended up alone here floating through long wasted days, or great tribulations..
While everything felt wrong.

Good words, strong words, words that could've moved mountains. Words that no one ever said.
We were all waiting to hear those words and no one ever said them. And the tactics never hatched.
And the plans were never mapped.
And we all learned not to believe.
And strange lonesome monsters loafed through the hills wondering why..

And it is best to never ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever wonder why. So tangle -- oh tangle us up in bright red ribbons!
Let's have a parade. It's been so long since we had a parade, so let's have a parade! Let's invite all our friends.
And all our friends' friends! Let's promenade down the boulevards with terrific pride and light in our eyes: twelve feet tall and staggering..

Sick with joy with the angels there and light in our eyes.
Brothers and Sisters, hope still waits in the wings like a bitter spinster; impatient, lonely and shivering, waiting to build her glorious fires. it's because of our plans man; our beautiful ridiculous plans. Let's launch them like careening jetplanes.
Let's crash all our planes in the river. Let's build strange and radiant machines at this Jericho waiting to fall."
-No-Bark Noonan (Probably)

 

This is the dumbest shit ever recorded. If you don't get it I can't blame you.

 

I\m looking forward to these films!

 

He's so cool

 

Heh Jaws is rated PG on Netflix.
Anyone here catch any good new horror movies for Halloween?