Fallout Haiku

Nuka-Cola stays
In my system for five days
Give me more today

Next: Red Ryder BB Gun

 

Red Ryder Rifle.
Shot the salesman's eye out.
Freaking hate that guy.

Next topic: Ian's accuracy.

 

Ian can't shoot shit.
The force field did not miss though.
I am glad he's dead.

Next: Selling Vic into slavery after having just rescued him.

 

"Thanks for the help, Boss.
If this blue jumpsuit fits me?
Maybe...mmmh...huh...haaaa!"

 

An adolescent.
I want his brains, nothing more.
Gray matter sorbet!

Next: General Barnaky

 

Caught in St Louis.
The mutants wanted intels,
The bots went at source.

 

Yeah they do. So what?
That would be what slaves are for.
At least there are slaves.


Next: Nukalurks

 

Fallout 3 is dead.
Van Buren carried our hope.
Bethesda stabbed us.

 

From NUKES this shelter
gave refuge once, but now from
simple landmine...not.

next: Bob (Harold's growing-out-of-head tree)

 

Herbert the tree friend
Growing out of Harold's head
I kid, he is Bob!

Edit:
Next: The Alien Blaster

 

The game's best weapon
Was a non-human weapon
I knew humans sucked.

Next: Wiping out the entire populace of Oasis....with a Ripper.

 

I dont know what Oasis
But know what inside its residents
Intensities on my ripper

Next: Guarding caravans

 

Guard for hire? I'm in.
Killing for fun? Sign me up
Looting is always fun

Nest Up: What Renesco thinks of the Chose One

 

"Primate, savage, beast":
with intelligence bellow
four, you'll prove his point.

next: Badger's girlfriend nanny job

 

Inside ships belly
Wanamingo puree lies,
punk girl pukes and cries.


Next: chickenhunting in Modoc

 

Imma hunt chicken
Comere moptherfucking dick
Holy fucking shit...

Next: Arm wrestling contest

 

Lost contest, I'm sore.
Me and my rubber doll need
puncture repair kit.

Next up: tarts comments on power armour in New Reno.

 

"To big" - you said,
to bad, indeed, so...
I just stepped on your head

Next: Stealing a bozar from the guard in NCR

 

I'll take one, two, three
but free, four, five, seven, eight
thousand loads...not free...

next: super mutants butt-scratching

 

They said it was gonna be good
They said they were gonna make it right
They lied