The most retarded things you've ever done

fully drunk, i once decided it would be cool to jump head-on down some stairs. well, thats quite normal, when drunk - but i convinced 2 other guys to do it simultaneously. nothing happened to us (ofc, we were drunk man!), but ALL our mobile phones were cracked and out of order after that. still one of my favorite retarded things i did.

i did a lot of retarded things - most of them regarding relationships, and for most of these i cant even use drunkenness as an axcuse.
 
Too many to count, but one that stands out happened about 6 years ago. I was watching the Daily Show lying on the floor and was messing around spraying one of those canned air dusters. Not sure how long it was (lost all perception of time), but my skin started buzzing and I realized that I had the fucking straw in my mouth and was straight up inhaling the shit.

Stood up, puked chef boyardee meatballs and red sauce all over the floor, crawled to my bed, and tried to sleep it off. Every time I would close my eyes it felt like I was spinning a hundred miles an hour. At this point I assume I blacked out, because I don't remember anything that happened after that.
 
Phil the Nuka-Cola Dude said:
Too many to count, but one that stands out happened about 6 years ago...<snip>... At this point I assume I blacked out, because I don't remember anything that happened after that.
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Wow - a 6 year blackout?

Welcome back to the world!

Well - according to your post count you have spent a fair amount of the time in these forums during those years - I know it's not much but perhaps you will be able to make sense of it from now on.
 
1. washed a 35 mm developed negative print film with water in order to take care of those nasty finger prints.
2. tried to cook while drunk. House caught fire while i slept. Woke up in my dark room, cause the cables had melted and the fuses went out. Well, i guess the part that is counter-retarded is that i put the fire out myself, turned off the gas tap that was engulfed in flames and took care of things. My neighbours upstairs never called the fire department because they didn't think that their floor being hot and smoke coming up meant anything was wrong. Guess their retardation beats mine. The hospital had students put IVs in me, and it hurt like hell.
3. when i get home in front of my door i take the subway card out of my pocket. When i get to the subway, in front of the toll-thingie i take out my keys. What's annoying is that it takes me 2-3 seconds to realize i'm staring at the subway toll gate like a retard with keys in my hand ready to be inserted in the card thingie.
 
Kick yourself

Everyone does it. Something stupid, something you know better than to do, sometime when you just didn't think before acting. Those times where you want to kick yourself in the nuts. Those times your friends will never let you live down.

Let's share some...


One very cold December, I went to Cleveland (from Pittsburgh) to see Amon Amarth in concert. It's about a 3-hour drive, and I forgot my sweater. When I got out of the car, I realized I forgot it at home, right by the door. Boy did I pay for that one. The doors opened an hour late due to some complication. I stood in the cold for a very long time that night. Great concert, hell of a time once I got in and warmed up. But it was too late. I was sick as hell the next three days.
 
I thought it was when he went to Cleaveland.

Why Cleaveland.

Mine....to many to name. Lets just say it involved a school bus and a vate of Acid.
 
Not long time ago, I posted a topic here "Most retarded thing you eved did"- I think that was the name.
 
horst said:
Public said:
Not long time ago, I posted a topic here "Most retarded thing you eved did"- I think that was the name.
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nice recursion, man.
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"Definition: An algorithmic technique where a function, in order to accomplish a task, calls itself with some part of the task"

Hmmm...
 
I cut open my big toe on a blunt metal cover used to protect the edges of our stairs from wear... that's me.
 
I made my round-trip transportation plans for my best friend's wedding according to my online banking quote. Of course, I had failed to account for banking update delays, and on my way home I wound up stranded on foot for 12 hours in a part of off-airport Houston that looked like one of the slums from RoboCop while I waited for a Western Union transfer.
 
...I said, "Come on, just the tip." to a very intelligent girl I was dating back in the day... I earned "the look" for my stupidity... Don't rock the cradle.
 
I once nearly lost my eye to a swinging branch while woodcutting. Luckily it hit me on the cheekbone instead. Anyway, it was a typical bit of carelessness, as I had a bunch of branches bent back while cutting and did not keep one slipping in mind.

Not a mistake I'll repeat soon. Stung like a bitch.
 
I've done my share of dumbass things. The dumbest thing I ever did was attempt a relationship with a girl who had a boyfriend. Granted the BF was 300 miles away and like 5 years older than her and me and the girl were good friends - but it was still a dumbass move. But hey, I was young and stupid.
 
Re: Kick yourself

Yawgmoth43 said:
Everyone does it. Something stupid, something you know better than to do, sometime when you just didn't think before acting. Those times where you want to kick yourself in the nuts. Those times your friends will never let you live down.

Let's share some...


One very cold December, I went to Cleveland (from Pittsburgh) to see Amon Amarth in concert. It's about a 3-hour drive, and I forgot my sweater. When I got out of the car, I realized I forgot it at home, right by the door. Boy did I pay for that one. The doors opened an hour late due to some complication. I stood in the cold for a very long time that night. Great concert, hell of a time once I got in and warmed up. But it was too late. I was sick as hell the next three days.
Click to expand...
Wait, your "I did something really stupid" moment was forgetting to put on a sweater? That's it?

Also, my stupid thing was probably neglecting to test whether a wire was live when I was replacing a lamp.
Good thing the electricity went through just two spots on my thumb. Burnt the skin pretty badly, though.

Also, still having the habit of tearing instead of cutting my toenails and causing a nail to grow in.
 
Just recently while doing electrical work in my shed, I left a live wire active that was split at the end. The next day I came back to fiddle with it and it shocked the hell out of me.

I need to learn more to focus on one thing at a time. I could of very well started an electrical fire, plus I have combustive chemicals out there. As much as I love funny scenarios happening, I love my shed and my lot-line more.
 
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