The most retarded things you've ever done

Once found a 20 dollar bill on the ground and gave it to a police officer I saw saying that someone must've lost it. Stupid move, since he probably kept the money that I should've kept to begin with.
 
Dopemine Cleric said:
Hah, I shaved my eyebrows off when I shaved my head a while ago just to see what it would have looked like.
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eyebrows are there for a reason.

sweat + eyes don't mix. remember that.
 
Most retarded? Uh...let's see:

- seting someone's tool shack on fire with a deodorant, matches and some glue (fortunatly it was a secluded shack)

- getting hit by a car twice

- getting drunk as hell and calling my friend, proposing her wild sex of all diffrent kinds

- hiding behind a car during hide&seek game. The engine was on, the driver was about to move. Fortunatly I escaped in time. BTW I was 10 at that time

That's about everything I can remember of right now.
 
generalissimofurioso said:
McRae means tits.

He always means tits.

Every word out of his mouth means tits.
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You know me that well? hehe. yeah, I meant tits. hehe
 
I was at this party and I let this dude go down on me in front of a crowd of friends in exchange for this chick I really liked going down on me after in front of everybody. I was so disgusted that i temporary lost my ability to get an erection.
 
1. Reading every Fallout 3 news for over 1 year.
2. Replying to almost every Fallout 3 news for over 1 year.
3. Losing time for long arguments about Fallout 3.
 
SuAside said:
TorontRayne said:
I was joking around once while my mom was driving. She stopped at a stop sign and I got out of the car and started running around like a jackass. My mom didn't notice and started to drive off. I quickly tried to get in the truck,but my leg got pulled under and I got ran over. It hurt....a lot.
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ladies & gentlemen, i think we have a winner! :clap:
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I'm honored.
 
After playing Fallout 2 I aspired to build myself a "pipe-rifle". But found out the hard way this is not the easiest task to do while sleep deprived, the brain doesn't funtion correctly. I forget what my deductive reasoning for doing this was but for some reason I decided to use pvc for the barrel.
My pipe-rifle worked (sorta), I hit what I was aiming at (a soda-pop can) but unfortunately the structural integrity of the barrel wasn't enough to withstand the pressure of the bullet and shattered into Hell-only-knows how many pieces.
Luckily I was wearing my sunglases, so nothing got into my eyes but I did recieve a great many scratches up my arm and across both hands.
After I got some sleep though, I did recalibrated and used a metal pipe. Which worked well, but was not accurate at distances beyond 20 feet.
(Keep in mind that this was in the deserts of Arizona so no one was really around to catch me because it is unfortunately illeagal as I found out in later years.)
 
Nightling said:
After playing Fallout 2 I aspired to build myself a "pipe-rifle". But found out the hard way this is not the easiest task to do while sleep deprived, the brain doesn't funtion correctly. I forget what my deductive reasoning for doing this was but for some reason I decided to use pvc for the barrel.
My pipe-rifle worked (sorta), I hit what I was aiming at (a soda-pop can) but unfortunately the structural integrity of the barrel wasn't enough to withstand the pressure of the bullet and shattered into Hell-only-knows how many pieces.
Luckily I was wearing my sunglases, so nothing got into my eyes but I did recieve a great many scratches up my arm and across both hands.
After I got some sleep though, I did recalibrated and used a metal pipe. Which worked well, but was not accurate at distances beyond 20 feet.
(Keep in mind that this was in the deserts of Arizona so no one was really around to catch me because it is unfortunately illeagal as I found out in later years.)
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nearly got yourself a Darwin Award there...
 
Nightling said:
After playing Fallout 2 I aspired to build myself a "pipe-rifle". But found out the hard way this is not the easiest task to do while sleep deprived, the brain doesn't funtion correctly. I forget what my deductive reasoning for doing this was but for some reason I decided to use pvc for the barrel.
My pipe-rifle worked (sorta), I hit what I was aiming at (a soda-pop can) but unfortunately the structural integrity of the barrel wasn't enough to withstand the pressure of the bullet and shattered into Hell-only-knows how many pieces.
Luckily I was wearing my sunglases, so nothing got into my eyes but I did recieve a great many scratches up my arm and across both hands.
After I got some sleep though, I did recalibrated and used a metal pipe. Which worked well, but was not accurate at distances beyond 20 feet.
(Keep in mind that this was in the deserts of Arizona so no one was really around to catch me because it is unfortunately illeagal as I found out in later years.)
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I've always wondered how well that would work. I'm impressed you tried.

Also I'd like to add it's wonderful to live in a very rural area where people don't know about what a person does so they can attempt often fun/constructive things that while good many people would consider "wrong" though they are in no way "wrong".

Sincerely,
The Vault Dweller
 
When I was in grade school, me and some friends were on our way home after class when we came across several wooden reels like these:

img4.gif


We thought it would be great fun to roll them towards a nearby slope, push them off the edge and watch as they tumble towards the bottom. The nearest slope had a house with a fenced yard at the bottom, but that didn't deter us. We pushed all the reels off the edge and after reaching the bottom at some speed they all crashed onto the fence of the yard, completely destroying a large portion of it.

The owner of the house immediately took notice of what we did, grabbed an axe, got onto his mo-ped and attempted to come after us. We ran like hell and hid at a nearby construction site for an hour or two until we made sure he hadn't spotted us and that he had given up the chase, all the while imagining stories of how he would gut us should he find us.

None of us sustained any injuries because of our actions but I can't help but feel rather retarded for participating in that particular incident.
 
That was funny....

We had one of those reels out at my grandmother's place. Keep in mind that this, again, is in Arizona and desert dunes are fun. Running backwards, trying to stay atop this thing as it rolls down the hill. Until, at least, the 'wheel' of the thing hits a yucca plant and I am no longer to maintain my balance and promptly fall forward off the thing and get run over by the wooden spindle. The thing then continued to roll down the dune and across the dirt road and into a shaggy-bark-cedar tree.

I miss being young, agile, daring, stupid and in the desert where no one will bother you or tell you that you can't do something...
 
The most retarded thing I've ever done?

Being a co-pilot in illegal races, 230kph+.
 
I have always been good at hurting myself, and doing other stupid things in general.
Some of the dumbest things I can recall off the top of my head would be:

When I was 11, I tried stabbing a wall with a knife that had a blunt tip but a serrated edge. (yeah, I know)
My hand of course slipped on the grip upon impact and slid down the edge, cutting off one and a half sinew in my little finger.
Even after surgery and over 12 years passed, I still can't extend or bend my finger fully. Lesson learned.

At 14, me and a mate (also 14) was test driving his 'new' crappy car at pretty much full speed on a very narrow road at winter time.
He was driving.

Me: Can I pull the hand brake?
Mate: Sure!
Me: Now?
Mate: Sure!
...
Probably took us the rest of the afternoon to get the car back on the road. Lesson learned.

Still at 14, my dad asked me to back the car a few metres down the drive way.
I learned about blind zones that day.
Backing the car into a tree costed my dad 30000 NOK (the equivalent of $5200) Lesson learned.

Still 14, but after getting my own crappy car. Driving said car at pretty much full speed (as always) on a small field next to our house,
I lost control of it and ran over one of my fathers fruit trees and smashing into another. Plums covering the hood of the car.
My dad never noticed the tree was missing (or at least never said anything about it), and I hid the remains of the poor tree safely in the woods.
Problem was the tree I ran over completely ripped off all the steel diesel pipes underneath the car. Took a while to replace them with plastic hoses.
It eventually became it's bane. Lesson learned.

All this said, I feel I must mention that I have never had an accident during 5 years of holding a drivers license for car,
and 1 year for motorcycle. (must be due to all the lessons learned at youth)

At about 15 me and a two mates decided to make a convertible out of an old VW Golf using an angle grinder.
It looked great, though it had a few dangerously sharp edges.
We eventually learned that a lot of the support for the chassis was in the roof construction when the car finally broke in half.
The owner of the car, (older brother of one mate) got pretty pissed when he discovered what we had done.
We didn't thing he would use it anymore since it had been left without license plates for so long. Lesson learned.

When I was 16 I built a spud gun. Me and my mates had a lot of fun up until I wanted to check exactly how powerful the air blast was without ammo.
We did a couple of tests including one where we fired at the long grass. The grass sort of just swayed as if a wind had moved it,
so I was expecting nothing more than a warm breeze when I put my hand in front of it for the final test.

I had my hand at about half a metre from the muzzle and it still managed to send me whirling 200 degrees and knocking me to the ground.
It took over 20 minutes before I could feel or move even a small muscle in my hand. I was certain I had ruined it completely.
It finally started stinging madly as the blood found its way back, and the pain gradually came. Lesson learned. ( I fortunately have no problems with this hand today)

At 19 I was in the army, and during a 15km test I carried 2 extra backpacks and one extra G3 rifle because 2 of my room mates didn't manage to carry it themselves. Due to extra weight and no soles in my boots, (left to dry with no time to get them at sudden departure) I developed tibiaperiostitt
(english term?) in both legs. Took me 3 months to get rid of it. Damn painful. Lesson ...learned?

Later, during a winter exercise, my six man arctic ranger unit was skiing across the arctic tundra of northern Norway, when the man carrying the MG3 (11kg machine gun) couldn't bear it anymore. After some time spent discussing possibilities, I said 'Fuck it. Put it on my back pack'. So some kilometres later, after adding 11kg to my already 50-55kg backpack I managed to fall in a slope, causing ruin to my back. I didn't notice much immediately, but the next day I almost couldn't move. The fucking useless corporal bastard refused to call medevac, and forced me to carry the same bloody backpack the same route back to HQ. If I ever see that fucking cunt again, I swear I will hurt him bad!. Mistake of my life. Still suffer extensive back problems after almost 4 years. Lesson ...learned?


Sorry for long post. There's unfortunatly more...
 
hmmm...funny....i have done a lot of retarded things in my life but no matter how much i think i can't remember anything !
maybe i should start doing something right now !
 
Jack The Knife said:
I have always been good at hurting myself, and doing other stupid things in general.
Some of the dumbest things I can recall off the top of my head would be:

When I was 11, I tried stabbing a wall with a knife that had a blunt tip but a serrated edge. (yeah, I know)
My hand of course slipped on the grip upon impact and slid down the edge, cutting off one and a half sinew in my little finger.
Even after surgery and over 12 years passed, I still can't extend or bend my finger fully. Lesson learned.

At 14, me and a mate (also 14) was test driving his 'new' crappy car at pretty much full speed on a very narrow road at winter time.
He was driving.

Me: Can I pull the hand brake?
Mate: Sure!
Me: Now?
Mate: Sure!
...
Probably took us the rest of the afternoon to get the car back on the road. Lesson learned.

Still at 14, my dad asked me to back the car a few metres down the drive way.
I learned about blind zones that day.
Backing the car into a tree costed my dad 30000 NOK (the equivalent of $5200) Lesson learned.

Still 14, but after getting my own crappy car. Driving said car at pretty much full speed (as always) on a small field next to our house,
I lost control of it and ran over one of my fathers fruit trees and smashing into another. Plums covering the hood of the car.
My dad never noticed the tree was missing (or at least never said anything about it), and I hid the remains of the poor tree safely in the woods.
Problem was the tree I ran over completely ripped off all the steel diesel pipes underneath the car. Took a while to replace them with plastic hoses.
It eventually became it's bane. Lesson learned.

All this said, I feel I must mention that I have never had an accident during 5 years of holding a drivers license for car,
and 1 year for motorcycle. (must be due to all the lessons learned at youth)

At about 15 me and a two mates decided to make a convertible out of an old VW Golf using an angle grinder.
It looked great, though it had a few dangerously sharp edges.
We eventually learned that a lot of the support for the chassis was in the roof construction when the car finally broke in half.
The owner of the car, (older brother of one mate) got pretty pissed when he discovered what we had done.
We didn't thing he would use it anymore since it had been left without license plates for so long. Lesson learned.

When I was 16 I built a spud gun. Me and my mates had a lot of fun up until I wanted to check exactly how powerful the air blast was without ammo.
We did a couple of tests including one where we fired at the long grass. The grass sort of just swayed as if a wind had moved it,
so I was expecting nothing more than a warm breeze when I put my hand in front of it for the final test.

I had my hand at about half a metre from the muzzle and it still managed to send me whirling 200 degrees and knocking me to the ground.
It took over 20 minutes before I could feel or move even a small muscle in my hand. I was certain I had ruined it completely.
It finally started stinging madly as the blood found its way back, and the pain gradually came. Lesson learned. ( I fortunately have no problems with this hand today)

At 19 I was in the army, and during a 15km test I carried 2 extra backpacks and one extra G3 rifle because 2 of my room mates didn't manage to carry it themselves. Due to extra weight and no soles in my boots, (left to dry with no time to get them at sudden departure) I developed tibiaperiostitt
(english term?) in both legs. Took me 3 months to get rid of it. Damn painful. Lesson ...learned?

Later, during a winter exercise, my six man arctic ranger unit was skiing across the arctic tundra of northern Norway, when the man carrying the MG3 (11kg machine gun) couldn't bear it anymore. After some time spent discussing possibilities, I said 'Fuck it. Put it on my back pack'. So some kilometres later, after adding 11kg to my already 50-55kg backpack I managed to fall in a slope, causing ruin to my back. I didn't notice much immediately, but the next day I almost couldn't move. The fucking useless corporal bastard refused to call medevac, and forced me to carry the same bloody backpack the same route back to HQ. If I ever see that fucking cunt again, I swear I will hurt him bad!. Mistake of my life. Still suffer extensive back problems after almost 4 years. Lesson ...learned?


Sorry for long post. There's unfortunately more...
Click to expand...

Do you have life insurance?

Sincerely,
The Vault Dweller
 
I can say the dumbest things I did often involved getting other people out the situation they put them selves into.

Like the time I almost pulled both my arms of a socket, trying to stop somebody from failing off a cliff. O what fun that was. It was great it was the sterotyplical 100ft plunge into jagged rocks below.
 
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