If they properly copied Kreia, it would have been actually a desent movie.
STAR WARS: THE LAST JEDI (HUGE SPOILERS EVERYWHERE)
- Thread starter CT Phipps
- Start date
I would also have rather seen Timothy Zahn's take on the Clone Masters rather than what we got in the Prequels.
I also rather imagined Anakin Skywalker appearing in the movies as a young Old Republic pilot rather than a child who was then raised by the Jedi Order.
In general I pretty much ignore everything Star Wars related since 1999 with the exception of the jedi Knight games and the KOTOR games.
But if having to choose I would rather take George Lucas' timeline over that of Disney's.
I also rather imagined Anakin Skywalker appearing in the movies as a young Old Republic pilot rather than a child who was then raised by the Jedi Order.
In general I pretty much ignore everything Star Wars related since 1999 with the exception of the jedi Knight games and the KOTOR games.
But if having to choose I would rather take George Lucas' timeline over that of Disney's.
CT Phipps
Carbon Dated and Proud
No, I totally understand. Fiction helps shape us.
Walpknut
This ghoul has seen it all
80% of the movie is padding. Poorly written padding too. The rest was so focused on "subverting expectations" it forgot to not be a boring fart.
The character of Rose rung some rather loud SELF INSERT alarms. Didn't help that the actress couldn't act for shit and that her dialogue was so bad. For a second I thought she was like the winner of some contest I wasn't aware of. Not only is she a fanboy of the "heroes" from the beginning but then she falls in love with one and gives him a grand speech about how they are gonna win. *barf*
There is also the thing with how thick and jarring the plot armor was. Hyperspace suicide ram (WHich looked badass) cuts several ships in 2 at light speed? Fin and Rose are literally unscratched while everything else around them is on fire.
An enemy ship flies into a closing door but gets in. Who was it? Oh just Fin and Rose, good thing they weren't inside the ships that crashed and blew up.
Fin tries to Suicide ram the Death Star cannon they only use to open doors and not shoot at the Rebel mother ship. The self insert tackles him out of the way and then they end up injured in the middle of the battle ship a few meters away from the enemy's tanks? He safely drags her back even tho almost every other soldier dies.
Are they gonna set up a love triangle on the second movie? That's dumb for several reasons. First one being that love triangles are hacky writing to begin with, second is that who would want to be in a romance with Kylo Ren? Dude looks like a fruit bat and he just throws tantrums around. He is that goth kid who shows up to school in leather and a spiked choker and it's always making a dumb "sad" face to seem mysterious but everybody just laughs at him. Rey goes from hating him without mercy (which makes sense, he did kill Solo and injured her only friend) but then after some off screen interactions she is completely convinced she can change him, starts calling him Ben and is just sooooo attached to him that she gets sad when he reveals that.... there is nothing to reveal, he is still the same one dimensional evil angsty teenager, he just now the main villlain. Also for the fanfic alarms, every character loudly comments on how conflicted he is, they just are so into his CONFLICT!!!!!! but his characterization shows none of that.
Hate to piss on the recently deceased but Carrie FIsher's performance an Leia in this movie was pretty bad. She smirks all the way through even in what should be dramatic moments. I would have no problems with Leia unconciously using the force to save herself but the visual was too silly. CGI Leia in a superman pose. Hey talking about that Plot armor, she was in a room that was shot out by enemy ships and the only thing she suffered was being sucked out into space, no horrible burns o injuries from the attack, and she didn't even boil alive from being in the vaccum of space.
THose are my rambling thoughts.
Bad movie. I'll say it's even worse than TFA, that one was bad because it was a rehash of the first movie with worse writing but it at least wasn't a meandering mess of abandoned plot lines.
The character of Rose rung some rather loud SELF INSERT alarms. Didn't help that the actress couldn't act for shit and that her dialogue was so bad. For a second I thought she was like the winner of some contest I wasn't aware of. Not only is she a fanboy of the "heroes" from the beginning but then she falls in love with one and gives him a grand speech about how they are gonna win. *barf*
There is also the thing with how thick and jarring the plot armor was. Hyperspace suicide ram (WHich looked badass) cuts several ships in 2 at light speed? Fin and Rose are literally unscratched while everything else around them is on fire.
An enemy ship flies into a closing door but gets in. Who was it? Oh just Fin and Rose, good thing they weren't inside the ships that crashed and blew up.
Fin tries to Suicide ram the Death Star cannon they only use to open doors and not shoot at the Rebel mother ship. The self insert tackles him out of the way and then they end up injured in the middle of the battle ship a few meters away from the enemy's tanks? He safely drags her back even tho almost every other soldier dies.
Are they gonna set up a love triangle on the second movie? That's dumb for several reasons. First one being that love triangles are hacky writing to begin with, second is that who would want to be in a romance with Kylo Ren? Dude looks like a fruit bat and he just throws tantrums around. He is that goth kid who shows up to school in leather and a spiked choker and it's always making a dumb "sad" face to seem mysterious but everybody just laughs at him. Rey goes from hating him without mercy (which makes sense, he did kill Solo and injured her only friend) but then after some off screen interactions she is completely convinced she can change him, starts calling him Ben and is just sooooo attached to him that she gets sad when he reveals that.... there is nothing to reveal, he is still the same one dimensional evil angsty teenager, he just now the main villlain. Also for the fanfic alarms, every character loudly comments on how conflicted he is, they just are so into his CONFLICT!!!!!! but his characterization shows none of that.
Hate to piss on the recently deceased but Carrie FIsher's performance an Leia in this movie was pretty bad. She smirks all the way through even in what should be dramatic moments. I would have no problems with Leia unconciously using the force to save herself but the visual was too silly. CGI Leia in a superman pose. Hey talking about that Plot armor, she was in a room that was shot out by enemy ships and the only thing she suffered was being sucked out into space, no horrible burns o injuries from the attack, and she didn't even boil alive from being in the vaccum of space.
THose are my rambling thoughts.
Bad movie. I'll say it's even worse than TFA, that one was bad because it was a rehash of the first movie with worse writing but it at least wasn't a meandering mess of abandoned plot lines.
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Jogre
So Old I'm Losing Radiation Signs
I mean, to be fair, Darth Vader was one of the most powerful force users who ever lived, Kylo Ren is Kylo Ren.
Also Kylo had taken a bowcaster shot to the chest, and was barely standing.
The comparison people make between Rey and Luke in there ability to take on respective villains is quite frankly an unfair comparison. It'd be the equivalent of comparing soloing an entire dungeon to being the last party member fighting a boss that was already down half.
Walpknut
This ghoul has seen it all
Luke tries to fight Vader after a few days of training in the second movie and gets trashed.
Rey closes her eyes on the first movie and masters every Jedi power known.
Rey closes her eyes on the first movie and masters every Jedi power known.
CerberusGate
I should save my game in a whole new slot
retardette
First time out of the vault
Last year during lunch break
in the marketing headquaters of Disney...
in the marketing headquaters of Disney...
Episode VIII
THE LAST JEDI
The FIRST WHAT EVER LETS CALL IT THE EMPIRE does things in space. Having decimated the bloated lazy fat Republic with Death Star 5000, Supreme Leader Hugh Hefner after cancer treatment now deploys his minions, played by friends of the director, to win the annual cosplay contest for the best original trilogy empire uniforms.
Only General Leia Poppins band of GESTAPO ACTING hack-frauds, electro-shocking defectors and locking them up, add confusion to the audience, certain that former Jedi Master Luke Skywalker, now living in a nudism commune nurturing his master-slave relationship with his alien cow space-cum dispenser girlfriend, will return and restore a spark of hope in this clusterfuck of a film only to make it even worse.
IN LOVING MEMORY OF
ADMIRAL AKBAR
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Prone Squanderer
A bit of a Sillius Soddus.
EDIT: Then again perhaps the guy was just fed up with his job and decided to pretend the mind trick worked.
https://brorlandi.github.io/StarWarsIntroCreator/#!/AL0kPqKconoZrwxLKnh_
*Credit to @Kilus for finding the link. https://brorlandi.github.io/StarWarsIntroCreator
nkchan16
Look, Ma! Two Heads!
Glorified fan fiction, that's what these new movies really are and Star Wars fan fiction have always made me cringe. Lucky for me, starting with the Ewoks, GL had already killed the SW fandom in me, so I no longer feel the need to pay to watch these annoying kids movies.
I'm one of those who watched "Star Wars", which is called as "Episode IV" nowadays, in a theater when it first came out back in the 70's. I was about 8 years old back then and was an instant fan. And this is what SW is to me these days...
I wouldn't watch this piece of shit even if I was still the same 8 year old kid.
I'm one of those who watched "Star Wars", which is called as "Episode IV" nowadays, in a theater when it first came out back in the 70's. I was about 8 years old back then and was an instant fan. And this is what SW is to me these days...
I wouldn't watch this piece of shit even if I was still the same 8 year old kid.
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Prone Squanderer
A bit of a Sillius Soddus.
nkchan16
Look, Ma! Two Heads!
Nah, I just let the pity flow through me, don't care enough about it to hate it.
Why were the Ents so reluctant march against the First Order?
mithrap
Ring a ding-ding, baby
The last jedi left me with conflicting thoughts. After a few days, I think I can say that it was a decent star wars but a bad movie.
First thing first, it has great redeeming qualities. Mark Hamill was great and I loved the scene when he explains what the force is. It's simple, it's a new way of seeing it, it's interesting... that one scene redeemed the entire movie as far as I'm concerned. The fight scene with the power rangers is also... "new". It's a bold move and I like it, it works pretty well and it has been a long time since there was a real "fuck yeah" scene in a Star Wars movie. I loved the WWII inspired bombers and the scenes taking place inside them, it's a new perspective that I enjoyed. The Yoda scene is pretty great, even if it raises questions (I mean, couldn't Anakin just... have a chat with Kylo Ren ?). I don't have a problem with the porgs (or whatever they're called), they're cute and don't feel out of place after we've seen the freaking ewoks.
Also, I don't have that much of a problem with the subplot of Finn and Rose that many people hate so much. Sure, you could remove it and the movie would still "mostly" work, and clearly, that's a problem. But in the end, they tried to show a new place, new races, some new tech etc. And in the end, it may not work as intended, but at least it tries to do what's expected from a Star Wars. So that's alright to me. I mean, I didn't like Episode II much, but at least every single setting is something new, full of alien life, and nothing you could see in the real world, and that's what matters the most for me. The romance was shit (but it's supposed to sound off when you think about it. A teenage virgin monk would say way cringier things in real life if he had Natalie Portmann teasing him while wearing a tight white bodysuit. The whole romance is supposed to show that the Jedi religion is utterly wrong, by not helping people actually understand emotions and human relationships)
My problem with this movie (and by extension, with this new trilogy) is how... "negative" it is. I may have trouble explaining it to be honest. But I mean, look at this:
The characters endured, made heavy sacrifices, changed and fought tooth and nails for years. And they won. The Empire is finally down. The last sith is dead. Darth Vader came back to the light and became a happy force spirit with his old friends. Luke and Leia are a happy family, Han is no longer a lone wolf and is in love. The ewoks sing while every world we saw does the same.
Annnd nothing of that even matters now. None of the efforts Leia, Luke and Han did mattered, when you think about it. The republic is destroyed in seconds and a dumbed down version of the empire is back, crushing everything without resistance. The siths are back. Darth Vader's sacrifice doesn't matter in the end. His legacy turned into a new horror. Luke and Leia are separated and Luke is a heartbroken guy who had his dreams crushed by a brat. Han returned to his "a new hope" state and kept doing that for decades like the dealer you knew in school who is still hanging at a friend's couch decades after.
I mean, I get that there needs to be new conflicts, but it could be done without turning the ones of the original trilogy useless. I don't mind the series becoming more "cynical" (hell, I LOVED Rogue One and in the end, Empire strikes back was a freaking masterpiece), I just think it could be that without cancelling the "victory" that ended the original trilogy. I don't actually know how to explain what I feel about this to be honest, it's a pretty abstract feeling I had when leaving the theater.
Also, the first order is too dumb to be taken seriously as an antagonist. At this point, I expect them to be just one of the many, many rogue orders that Admiral Thrawn would decimate in a matter of weeks and then forget about them (I would LOVE if it turns out to be true, and if the "true empire" of Thrawn ends up destroying the first order instead of the resistance, thus becoming the good guys in the eyes of the galaxy. Now, that would be a good twist.). Their losses ratio for each encounter is way, way too high. I have trouble seeing them as a threat at this point. Same could be said for their leader by extension, the sith version of Hugh Hefner, doesn't really matters in the grand scale of things, even if he "could" be interesting.
There are problems with the characters as well. Except for Luke (and Rey, a tiny little bit), they don't progress. At all. At the end of the movie, they are exactly who they were at the beginning. None of the experiences actually shape them in any way. The humor is alright, not as cringy and intrusive as I feared it would be. It's pretty light. I had more problem with the "rebel scum" shot, a little bit too "meme" and in your face.
The music is wonderful as always, but it's mostly variations of the original themes, I don't remember hearing anything really new.
In the end, I felt like watching a good fanfiction, and overall a good star wars, but a pretty bad movie. It's worth seeing, don't get me wrong. But I have my shares of grudges with it, even with a open mind (I'm genuinely interested by Rey's storyline and I want to know where it's going). I actually think that Disney handles the franchise pretty well when it comes to introducing it to a new generation, but yeah.
First thing first, it has great redeeming qualities. Mark Hamill was great and I loved the scene when he explains what the force is. It's simple, it's a new way of seeing it, it's interesting... that one scene redeemed the entire movie as far as I'm concerned. The fight scene with the power rangers is also... "new". It's a bold move and I like it, it works pretty well and it has been a long time since there was a real "fuck yeah" scene in a Star Wars movie. I loved the WWII inspired bombers and the scenes taking place inside them, it's a new perspective that I enjoyed. The Yoda scene is pretty great, even if it raises questions (I mean, couldn't Anakin just... have a chat with Kylo Ren ?). I don't have a problem with the porgs (or whatever they're called), they're cute and don't feel out of place after we've seen the freaking ewoks.
Also, I don't have that much of a problem with the subplot of Finn and Rose that many people hate so much. Sure, you could remove it and the movie would still "mostly" work, and clearly, that's a problem. But in the end, they tried to show a new place, new races, some new tech etc. And in the end, it may not work as intended, but at least it tries to do what's expected from a Star Wars. So that's alright to me. I mean, I didn't like Episode II much, but at least every single setting is something new, full of alien life, and nothing you could see in the real world, and that's what matters the most for me. The romance was shit (but it's supposed to sound off when you think about it. A teenage virgin monk would say way cringier things in real life if he had Natalie Portmann teasing him while wearing a tight white bodysuit. The whole romance is supposed to show that the Jedi religion is utterly wrong, by not helping people actually understand emotions and human relationships)
My problem with this movie (and by extension, with this new trilogy) is how... "negative" it is. I may have trouble explaining it to be honest. But I mean, look at this:
The characters endured, made heavy sacrifices, changed and fought tooth and nails for years. And they won. The Empire is finally down. The last sith is dead. Darth Vader came back to the light and became a happy force spirit with his old friends. Luke and Leia are a happy family, Han is no longer a lone wolf and is in love. The ewoks sing while every world we saw does the same.
Annnd nothing of that even matters now. None of the efforts Leia, Luke and Han did mattered, when you think about it. The republic is destroyed in seconds and a dumbed down version of the empire is back, crushing everything without resistance. The siths are back. Darth Vader's sacrifice doesn't matter in the end. His legacy turned into a new horror. Luke and Leia are separated and Luke is a heartbroken guy who had his dreams crushed by a brat. Han returned to his "a new hope" state and kept doing that for decades like the dealer you knew in school who is still hanging at a friend's couch decades after.
I mean, I get that there needs to be new conflicts, but it could be done without turning the ones of the original trilogy useless. I don't mind the series becoming more "cynical" (hell, I LOVED Rogue One and in the end, Empire strikes back was a freaking masterpiece), I just think it could be that without cancelling the "victory" that ended the original trilogy. I don't actually know how to explain what I feel about this to be honest, it's a pretty abstract feeling I had when leaving the theater.
Also, the first order is too dumb to be taken seriously as an antagonist. At this point, I expect them to be just one of the many, many rogue orders that Admiral Thrawn would decimate in a matter of weeks and then forget about them (I would LOVE if it turns out to be true, and if the "true empire" of Thrawn ends up destroying the first order instead of the resistance, thus becoming the good guys in the eyes of the galaxy. Now, that would be a good twist.). Their losses ratio for each encounter is way, way too high. I have trouble seeing them as a threat at this point. Same could be said for their leader by extension, the sith version of Hugh Hefner, doesn't really matters in the grand scale of things, even if he "could" be interesting.
There are problems with the characters as well. Except for Luke (and Rey, a tiny little bit), they don't progress. At all. At the end of the movie, they are exactly who they were at the beginning. None of the experiences actually shape them in any way. The humor is alright, not as cringy and intrusive as I feared it would be. It's pretty light. I had more problem with the "rebel scum" shot, a little bit too "meme" and in your face.
The music is wonderful as always, but it's mostly variations of the original themes, I don't remember hearing anything really new.
In the end, I felt like watching a good fanfiction, and overall a good star wars, but a pretty bad movie. It's worth seeing, don't get me wrong. But I have my shares of grudges with it, even with a open mind (I'm genuinely interested by Rey's storyline and I want to know where it's going). I actually think that Disney handles the franchise pretty well when it comes to introducing it to a new generation, but yeah.
CT Phipps
Carbon Dated and Proud
The First Order has proven consistently better than the Empire at just about everything. It's just no one can take them seriously because they look like millennials.
mithrap
Ring a ding-ding, baby
On a matter of results, absolutely. The first order destroyed its enemy in a single blow... But only because the new republic was dumb enough to have everyone's army in the entire galaxy gathered around one planet in "the force awakens". The empire couldn't have such radical results, since the rebellion wasn't dumb enough to have 100% of its forces in one place, when there's an entire galaxy around them.
Then, there's the matter of civilian control. The empire took over an entire galaxy in a matter of a few years and actually managed to keep it under its control for decades. It's hard to say if the first order even has a civilian world under his rule. We know they deal with trade worlds, but that's pretty much it.
Then, there's the military aspect. The first order succeeds in his missions, sure, but they lose a lot of assets at each encounter, too much to keep fighting at this rate for long. While the empire could afford heavy losses (since they had thousands of ways to replace the fallen ones), we don't know if that's the case here. The first order could be a rogue order consisting of a single fleet or a new whole empire with dozens of planets under its rule. It's pretty hard to say, since there's no much context given in the new movies (then again, if it's a way to introduce Thrawn who ends up destroying the first order like it's nothing and appear as the new good guy in the eyes of the galaxy, then I'm sold. Way to begin the next trilogy, and go with the "always a bigger fish" theme.)
Where I agree with you though, is with their engineering progress. Details we see with Phasma's armor that can deflect blasters and with the stormtroopers armed with weapons built to withstand a fight with a lightsaber. I loved that. They learnt about their enemies and actually engineered new ways to face them.
nkchan16
Look, Ma! Two Heads!
It was Sebastian Shaw as the ghost in that scene in the *original* RotJ, not Hayden Christensen. How unfortunate that the only DVD set I have of the original trilogy had this fucking scene in it... And how disrespectful it is for the actor and the fans who actually have seen the original before... Guess who thought this would be a good idea... It's a kids movie, like I said, it's always been... for kids who have no memories of what came before... Does that sound familiar?
CT Phipps
Carbon Dated and Proud
We might actually get those now because Fox owned those volumes and now Disney owns the Fox owned SW assets.
Walpknut
This ghoul has seen it all
I don't take the first Order seriously because they are poorly developed and somehow even more cartoonish than the Empire. Where do they get their resources? How are they so huge? Why is Ginger Sideburns so high up the command chain? Is this shit on some crappy tie in book? Because fuck that.